An Apology Letter to my Children
Confessions on the Silent Suffering of Every Flawed Parent
My Dear Children,
I know at this point in your life there are times when I seem mentally or emotionally absent. I seem distracted or depressed even.
You’re always telling me to chill out or relax, and I get it.
I guess I just want you to know from where this problem of mine comes.
I want to let you inside my head for a small moment. I say small moment because it’s not always pretty in there.
Being a parent is a hard job, and I have made more than my share of mistakes. And the agony is that I realize you have often been a victim to my shortcomings and failings. From my DNA to my daily struggles, you feel the repercussions of a mother who loves you with all of her heart, who wants desperately to be perfect for you but is, sadly, all too human.
And when you are a parent, being human comes with a lot of guilt, some of which keeps me from being totally present and connected to you in the way that I want.
Okay, where shall I start?
I’ll start with you, my baby, my firstborn.
My darling seventeen-year-old son, I am so sorry.