Seventh Letter, January 19

Dear Berlin,

For all that it is not, today is a remarkably good day for us. Perhaps it’s unhealthy that it is only through my large and obvious mistake that I stop blaming you for a bit because I’m more realistically blaming myself.

It’s okay though; we learn, we grow.

I find myself talking to nobody, muttering under my breath, or silently rehearsing phrases several times today. I wonder a little if I’m crazy, if I have always done this, and how it makes me appear to others. Curious.

Today my head hurts and I eat crackers. Then Pommes at the new cafe, Mo’s Kitchen. I keep the lights off and movement to a minimum after the harrowing experience of bussing to and from Zehlendorf for class today. Thank the good Lord that my afternoon student didn’t show.

I’m not proud of last night, though it was fun, or this morning, though I survived. But I am feeling more at home here than I ever have. Perhaps yesterday’s gathering of the roommates at lunch, the first such occasion that has taken place since I moved here in October, brought that about. Or Wednesday’s adventure to Potsdam and back to Neukölln with Kelsey, or pre-drinking with a bunch of university kids before going to a university bar… there’s a bit more home in the air.

And I’m very much excited for Sophie to come and meet us in March!

Affectionately,