On the Normality of violence and anger.

My sister and I fought a lot when we were younger. I don’t know why. We’re both opinionated people, maybe we were just more stubborn when we were kids. Sometimes it would get physical.

On one such occasion, we were arguing about something with some energy in front of a friend’s baby brother. He was a sensitive kid. We were yelling, he started crying and was visibly distressed about the anger on display in front of him. He was frightened and he hid behind his sister’s legs to get away. This was something he could not bear to see. I was shocked to see this reaction to our fighting, because our fighting had become so normal to me. I immediately realised how ridiculous it was to be so violent in our argument.

I was reminded of this event when I started thinking about just what hurts the most about the Trump win, to me. It’s not so much that someone like him — some individual- could possibly have the disgusting attitudes and thoughts that he does about some our most marginalised communities. Individuals are alone — their thoughts can be explained away, they can be talked to, they can be reasoned with, sometimes. They are no threat.

The endorsement for his views is what saddens me most. These thoughts are apparently widely held, publicly and vastly supported. This is what breaks my heart. This is what makes me think that anger and hatred and fear has won. This is not the world that I thought I was in.

This is what makes me want to retreat like a child. The world feels like it has shown me that it is a scary, vengeful, selfish place. I’m sorry I don’t have a positive, uplifting ending here.