WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO SLEEP?

A group of girlfriends and I decided we’d wear pajamas to our annual Christmas dinner party. It’s just us, no men — and dinner will be at home — but it’s gotten me thinking… I have nothing to wear. Call me “the Princess and the Pea,” but pajamas and nightgowns bunch and wad up and make it impossible for me to sleep. Something as small as a button feels like a golfball, and any kind of waistband — elastic or ones that tie — might as well be vice grips, and leggings are too constricting.

The only way I can get to sleep is by wearing nothing at all.

When I had a man in my life there were other reasons I didn’t wear pajamas and nightgowns: It’s difficult to project a come-hither look when you’re dressed like his mother. I wore teddies, kimonos or long figure-hugging silk chemises, but when it came time to sleep, they all wound up on the floor.

I own one pair of pajamas, navy blue silk with small, red polka dots, and I’ve had them for decades. They’re stored permanently in my luggage should I spend the night at someone’s home or share a hotel room with a girlfriend.

A few years ago I stayed at a girlfriend’s for the weekend. She had a house full of people, and I volunteered to sleep in her office… on a blowup mattress… on a poured concrete floor… in the winter. Silk is pretty, but it’s cold. It’s also slippery. For hours I struggled to get warm and to keep from sliding off the blowup mattress each time I rolled over. It was 2 am before I ditched those silk pjs and finally was able to fall sleep.

The only thing Marilyn Monroe wore to bed was Chanel No 5, but since I’m allergic to fragrance… That’s not an option either.

I wanted to write a Fashion Friday sleepwear blog in hopes of finding something that was comfortable and attractive.

Other than this $1,100 pair of red, silk floral pajamas — silk is slippery and cold, and cropped pants aren’t flattering to many of us, me included — but I would wear these, at least for a little while… if I could afford them,

and these cotton pajamas and robe I LOVE, but they’re no longer being made… I didn’t find ANYTHING that met my criteria!

Obviously I AM NOT the right person to offer suggestions about what to wear to bed.

Why do pajamas and nightgowns look like they’re either for little girls or something our mothers would wear? My mother wore the same ratty nightgown for 30 years. She also wrapped toilet tissue around her head and bobby-pinned it in place to preserve her weekly, beauty shop hairdo while she slept. She was a vision…

It just occurred to me that someday, when I’m an old lady, I might have to live in some kind of a care facility, and they’re going to require me to wear clothes when I sleep! What the flip will I do then?

Does anyone else have problems finding comfortable, affordable and attractive things to sleep in, or am I the only Princess and the Pea?