Applying parenting lessons in the workplace

Leadership lessons from your kids.

Photo by Roly Vasquez from Pexels

Sometime you hear it said in jest around the office how managing the workplace feels the same as looking after a bunch of kids. Whilst navigating the challenges of parenting, I have come across a number of resources where the tips have very wide applicability

Barabara Coloroso author of “The Kids are Worth It” discusses some great tips on the Farnam St Podcast which has wide crossover into the workplace. Some of the random comments that I picked up through the interview:

• With a mistake, you own it, you fix it, you learn from it and you move on.
• Praise-dependent, reward-dependent children make wonderful henchmen for bullies. They will do the bully’s bidding because they want whatever reward that bully is dangling in front of them.
• If it’s not life threatening, morally threatening, or unhealthy, let it go. Let them experience the consequences.
• For mistakes mischief and mayhem the THREE R’s — restitution, resolution, reconciliation
• R.S.V.P — consequences need to be Reasonable, Simple, Valuable and Practical

Discipline is a process we do with children

1. Show the children what they have done
2. Give them as much ownership of the problem that they can handle
3. Give them options for solving the problem
4. Leaves their dignity intact

6 Critical life messages

These are relevant for any leader:

• I believe in you
• I trust you
• Know you can handle it
• You are listened to
• You are cared for
• You are very important to me

Integrity

• Discern what is the right thing to do
• be willing to act when the burden is heavy
• be willing to speak up when it is more comfortable to be silent

Another resource I have found of interest is the work of the Gottman Institute and their work on Emotion Coaching. (Something as an engineer I need some help on myself!)

The five essential steps of Emotion Coaching:

• Be aware of your child’s emotion
• Recognize your child’s expression of emotion as a perfect moment for intimacy and teaching
• Listen with empathy and validate your child’s feelings
• Help your child learn to label their emotions with words
• Set limits when you are helping your child to solve problems or deal with upsetting situations appropriately

Let me know what you think? I’d love your feedback. If you haven’t already then sign up for a weekly dose just like this.

Get in touch… — linktr.ee/Tomconnor

More like this from 10x Curiosity

• Systems Archetypes- Places to intervene — An advantage with using systems archetypes as a problem solving methodology is that places to intervene in the system can be thought through and played with.
• Using system archetypes to shortcut problem solving — The use of systems thinking archetypes provide a powerful framework to approach problem solving.
• The Flywheel Effect
  Exploring the power of simple reinforcing loops executed over time
• Know your Domain — The Cynefin Framework
• Achieving Diversity — why being unbiased is not enough — Diversity is something we aspire to, but are we paying more than lip service to it? Are individual good intentions enough to achieve a diverse group setting, at work, socially or through the community?