’Cause, Baby, You’re a Sparkler—and That’s Okay
Not all of us are destined to shoot across the sky-y-y.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag, not one that transports groceries, but more like a transparent sandwich bag? You don’t even have that smooth, air-tight Ziploc slide going for you; you just kind of fold over on yourself.
It’s time to accept that we can’t all be the star of the show on the 4th of July. Some of us are meant to warm the crowd up from right here on the ground — and leave them not in awe but wondering, “Aw, what’s next?” Remember, there are no small parts, only small pyrotechnics.
Don’t let anyone tell you handheld fireworks aren’t as good as the fancy aerial ones. Your fear of heights and quiet demeanor shouldn’t get in the way of igniting your light, however little.
Look on the bright(er) side: dogs don’t scatter in fear of you, their tails tucked between their legs. While loud, extroverted fireworks typically make onlookers go “Oh, oh, oh,” you offer a moment of muted introspection on a busy holiday, like a “Hm. Okay.”
We’re talking the difference between applause by sweaty hands and posh finger snaps here. Rather than screaming “Look at me! I’m flying!” you gently nudge us to turn our heads and take in your tranquil, mesmerizing beauty. Classy.
As you’re drifting through the wind, or the slight breeze of a handheld fan, wanting to start again, consider that you’re the safer option. I don’t mean that in a boring way. Kids can enjoy you, since you aren’t very risky, especially compared to setting off the Sky Blaster Big Boom Ultra Nuclear Warhead 3000. No one runs away after lighting you. No one has ever questioned whether a sound was an errant neighborhood gunshot or you either.
Plus, instead of being gone in a flash, you burn low and slow (for about ninety seconds), like a rich, savory chili. You may not be brighter than the moon, moon, moon when it’s full (or a crescent, let’s be honest), but you’re certainly brighter than a new moon. That’s a fact.
And, while you typically don’t have colors to burst, your white hue is elegant and timeless, great for more than the 4th, from graduation parties to New Year’s to weddings. (Of course, fireworks make for an epic proposal backdrop, are a given on December 31, and look spectacular behind Magic Kingdom, but positive vibes only here, please.)
What does Katy Perry know, anyway? She’s not even a firework— I hear she’s actually half beach ball. You can volley that negativity right out of your life.
I’ll leave you with this: you can’t hold a lit aerial firework. Well, you could, but it might be the last thing you do. The truth is, holding you this 4th is the warmest embrace I’ll experience all year.
So go ahead, baby, own the night…or at least rent it. Show ’em what you’re worth.
