3 Secret Tricks to Win Every Argument With Your Spouse
Surprisingly, they strengthen your relationship too
I lived through hell. My girlfriend calls it the budding days of our relationship.
Gosh, how many times did we end up in foolish quarrels and non-bloody fights!
Thousand ways to kindle an argument out of nowhere.
But was there any way to smother it?
No.
Never, I thought, until I began experimenting with a few tricks.
It’s been four years to date. And every time, it has worked.
It only brought us closer than ever.
Magical!
Alright. Here’s what I did that helped me settle every argument and strengthened our relationship.
1. Drink Water
An argument ignites like a spark. Then, compounds (burns) like a forest fire.
So how do we put off the fire?
Water.
Any dispute is severe only in the heat of the moment. That’s exactly when you and your spouse should drink at least three glasses of water.
Hydration is linked to our stress level.
The more hydrated you are, the calmer you become.
“When your heart rate is up and you’re breathing more heavily, you’re losing fluid,” says Renee Melton, director of nutrition for Sensei.
So, when I sense an impending outburst, I’d offer my girlfriend a glass of water. Along with the water, we’d gulp down the argument too.
2. Deep Breathe
Deep breathing is an easy way to lower stress in the body.
When you get back home after a long day at your office, you’d drop dead on the bed and heave deep breaths.
Adopt such breathing practices.
Inhale slowly and deeply, and exhale slowly back to the original position.
Do this ten times with your spouse. Amidst a blazing debate, it signals your brain to be calmer, gives you the clarity to reflect upon things, and puts off the possibility of prolonging it further.
3. The ‘24-Hours’ Trick.
My favorite trick. Because it has a 100% winning rate.
Once my girlfriend wanted me to visit her. I denied it as her place was already swarmed with never-seen-before folks. Just introvert things!
But within minutes, we started clashing over the phone.
No room for a glass of water. Neither could I ask her to breathe.
Damn, she was already breathing fire.
So, I just said, “If this argument is worthy enough to be argued, let’s put this on hold for 24 hours. If we find ourselves with the same level of intensity after 24 hours, let’s resume.”
I disconnected the call.
In 1440 minutes, we realized how silly we were, we understood each other better, and we Skyped for a couple of hours.
It only brought us closer than ever.
What doesn’t work?
- Shouting.
- Abusing.
- Brooding.
What works?
- Drink water.
- Deep breathe.
- Hold for 24 hours.
A majority of the arguments in our lives are just useless.
