5 Effective Practices to Make You More Assertive

Thomas is a nice guy at work. He rarely says no to the work the boss assigned, even if it means he has to work over the weekends. When he is asked to get in touch with the consultant to check in with their deliverables, he doesn’t like to use pushy tones and sometimes the vague wording does not deliver a firm message of request. He is very likeable among the colleagues but he rarely speaks up the real thoughts or frustrations. When he does speak up, he acts carefully not to sound too aggressive.

Often we encounter passive people that fail to understand that assertiveness is a very powerful interpersonal skill that can get you what you want in a respectful manner.

Being assertive means you express yourself effectively and directly, delivering your point of view, without offending the rights and beliefs of others.

Here are five proactive ways to achieve assertiveness.

1. Quit adding “I think” to the beginning of every sentence of yours. It does no help reinforce your view but diminish your confidence right away. Simply just omit the phrase and you will sound 10 times more assertive already.
2. Setting boundaries and knows when to say no. We all want to be the star employee and be likeable, setting up boundaries early would only gaining you respect. You can be assertive when you say no without adding justifications if the request is not part of your obligations and is beyond your capacity.
3. Put your request upfront and be clear about the details. Whether you are negotiating your salary with your boss or asking your partner to help around the house, people do not want to guess what is in your mind and wait to hear what is it that you are asking for. Just because you’ve been burned out inside your mind doesn’t mean people actually know.
4. Use the right tone and body language to boost your confidence. Use a firm tone and keep an upright posture, but lean forward a bit.
5. Be mindful of your conversations and practice to get better. Reflect and review your communication styles. Were you being passive or passive-aggressive? Could you rephrase your request in an assertive way?

You are responsible for your needs, so take the initiative to seek it with assertiveness.

Originally published at https://2minutesgrowth.com on January 19, 2021.