11월초

귀를 멍멍하게 하는 침묵속에서
미울정도로 보고싶은 그 한 사람때문에..
모두 괜찮다고, 필요없다고 말하는
대일밴드는 단지 구급처치일 뿐이었다.

어떻게 한마디 말도 없이 지낼 수 있을까?

가끔, 아주 가끔 나를 찾아주길 바라고 있었던걸까?
나를 잊지 않길 기도하며..

물망초 효과처럼 말이다.

힘들고 아프거나 혼자라고 느껴질때면, 집생각이 그렇게 난다.
안정을 찾을 수 있는 나의 본토 보금자리..
그곳에 가면 이 어려움 또한 사라질 것 같아서..
깊은 곳에 숨겨놓은 나의 비밀들이 남겨진 그 곳엔
오랜시간 갈아놓았던 나의 칼이 묻혀진
나만의 해결책도 찾을 수 있을것이다.
그당시 내일에 관한 나의 수많은 꿈들과
나의 어린시절을 구경할 수 있는 박물관 같아서
가고 싶다..

It wasn’t apparent to Panko that perhaps he had done nothing wrong. The fact that things hadn’t panned out the way in which he had hope was no reflection on him. He had tried to be accommodating to every move on the chess board in his relationship. The problem was, regardless of his own intentions, he was playing against an opponent who could never be on his side. Winning or losing couldn’t make it better; the labour’s of love would be lost. The catch-22 was that: if his heart was to beat freely, his opponent’s would cease to function. And even though Panko knew that they were the reason his heart could beat at all, there was no way to reconcile the current gridlock. How could he show that he wasn’t the enemy? That he was on their side and that his love was true?

Destiny is just one possible destination…
“어디라는게 중요한게 아니다”
해가 뜨기전에 가장 어두울 그 때에
그전에는 내가 몰랐던 사실..