31 Days, 31 People
Day 29: ZIA
Almost four years after Sophia, surprise number two came along. Zia was born on February 5, 2009. Almost the exact same distance in years between my sister and me. We have exactly four years and one week between us.
I see a lot of similarities in my two girls to my sister and me. I always hope they’ll turn out to get along like my sister and I do.
I think kids are supposed to teach you things like love and patience, and to keep fun and youthfulness in the forefront of your life. Kids are lights of inspiration and can give us something to work toward and fight for. As lights, if Sophia is a bright white light, Zia is hot pink. I find two of the most important things I learn with Zia and her contrast with her sister, are balance and boldness.
I don’t see this balance as a contrast of opposites, but more a balance of emotional temperament. If there was anything left to learn about depth of love after having the first kid, it most certainly got soaked up after having the second, right? I clearly have a lot of learning left to do. I’m finding that these girls provide inspiration from very different sources. Where Sophia gives me depth of love, Zia gives me depth of hope. Both powerful and undeniable, but different. Seeking balance here is a beautiful place.
And boldness. Zia is intense. Independent. Emotional. Happy by default. If she’s with you she’s talking, if she’s not with you, you can hear her little voice singing in the other room. She’s non stop. She loves costumes, dressing up and imagination. She loves makeup and in her own words, being “a fancy lady.” Since the start of school, she’s been obsessed with being a cat. She’s never thought twice about being different than the other kids, I can see her seeking to be different in her own way. One of her teachers from her preschool actually dressed up as Zia on “What I want to be when I grow up” Day.
When we have more than one kid, I think our inclination is to try and treat them equally but in fact, they are such different individuals. They are different emotionally, they are different physically. They have to need things differently. Maybe fair isn’t actually fair when you take the differences into account. We can put equal love out there, but they may absorb it differently. I’m grateful for the difference, it’s challenging and I couldn’t appreciate it more.
I have a deep sense of gratitude for this unique little human. She’s five and I know we’ve only just begun. But already, I’ve learned so much.
Zia, you teach me to lighten up when I get too serious. You remind me that creativity is a never-ending pool inside us all and we can draw upon it at any time. You remind me to believe that everything is going to be awesome.
I love you, kiddo.
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