A Guide to Being a Better Hiring Manager from the Point of View of a Frequent Job Hunter

After job hunting and receiving hundreds of job rejections over the course of several years, I have desperately read through countless articles and blog post on how to interview, how to write resumes and cover letters, how to network, and anything else that would get me out of unemployment or underemployment. I followed the best advice by the most well known job-hunting sources and all of it has been useless. Because of the industry I mistakenly chose, the region mistakenly chose to live in (Silicon Valley), and circumstances completely beyond my control, job hunting has been one endless, heart breaking process.

After receiving so many rejections, I became acutely aware of the imbalance of respect between job seekers and hiring managers. They can hire or reject whomever they wish without any perceived consequences, while they expect job seekers to jump through hoops. Most job seekers do not have the option of choosing any job they want as the economy has a labor surplus. We are at the mercy of hiring managers, many of which are unprofessional, disrespectful, flaky, and, especially, passive-aggressive. The many useless articles and blogs directed to job seekers rarely address the fact that hiring managers have absolutely no respect for job seekers. The need for a job and the well documented ridiculousness of the hiring process too often force us to stifle our rage as job seekers. I think hiring managers are so focused on trying to identify candidate’s flaws that they are blind to their own mistakes and the blatant disrespect that results from this blindness. And I understand why — they are in power and job seekers are at their mercy. Like I’ve been told dozens of times, “it’s a buyer’s market.” But if hiring managers have a better understanding of the perspective of the job hunter, they will be able to better filter candidates for the position, not waste candidates’ or their own time, and not have the rejected candidate hate their guts. Below are the most irritating issues that I have experienced with hiring managers.

1) Hiring managers depend on HR people who have no knowledge of the job.

For me, interviews normally begin with a phone conversation with a person in HR who decides on whether or not I continue with the process. From my experience, I missed out on a lot of opportunities because this person did not understand the position that they are hiring for. They filter candidates based upon the specific keywords and phrases. As a result, qualified candidates are rejected while having the right skill set. For example, a well-known company contacted me for an interview because my profile matched a few of their open positions. Prior to the interview, I was not given the names of those positions, only the department I would work in. The interview went well until the interviewer asked me the vague question of “where do I see yourself in the future?” After I gave him my answer, he ended the interview abruptly. Confused, I asked him about next steps. He told me that he doesn’t want to continue because my answer did not match exactly, word-for-word, one of the open position that they were considering me for. This means that I was a single, two-syllable word away from advancing. I didn’t say that exact word so I was kicked out of the process. It is like asking me to guess a number between 1 and 1,000 and then guessing wrong. If the interviewer had any idea of what I was talking about, this would have gone differently. Because of his ignorance, time got wasted and this company missed out on a competent candidate.

2) Hiring managers are not punctual.

If a phone or an in-person interview is scheduled, hiring managers need to be as punctual as expected from job seekers. If the interviewer is delayed then they need to warn the candidate in advance and aware them of the delay. I understand the world is unpredictable, unplanned emergencies come up, and appointments must be postponed but I think many hiring managers simply don’t care about the schedules of candidates. I once had a recruiter from a large tech company contact me to schedule for a phone interview. We scheduled a time and I waited by the phone excited and eager. But when that time came, my phone never rung and no one sent me an email. I sent her a polite email asking if we needed to reschedule. Hours later, she replied apologizing for missing the interview because she was sick and ended the email with a sad face emoticon “:-(“ as if we were Facebook friends. This was a clear indication that she did not care and saw this as some kind of game. We rescheduled and once again, she did not show up and I had to hunt her down again to reschedule. This bizarre cat and mouse game happened three times. Finally, after I gave up, she randomly calls and we did the phone interview. I made an impression and was granted an onsite interview. She was suppose to greet me and of course she was late as well as all the hiring managers I was scheduled to speak to. Nevertheless, I thought the interview went well and was happy for the opportunity as I was unemployed at the time. I was promised a follow up within a week, which of course, I did not get (see point # 8). After weeks of waiting, and sending carefully timed emails (because I did not want to come on too strong), I finally got my rejection presumably because of “cultural fit” reasons (I’m the only person that could show up on time). That day, I learned a lesson on how little respect hiring managers can have for job seekers. They do not make the same efforts that job seekers have to make to be punctual because job seekers are largely powerless. And this was not an isolated incident as I have dealt with many hiring managers who could not abide by their own timelines. If hiring managers have any respect for job seekers then they need to understand that people have to plan around these interviews. Many people are unemployed, underemployed, or have family obligations. If I have to sit in hour of traffic to get to a interviewer’s office 15 minutes early, then the least they can do is be punctual or at least give a warning.

3) Hiring managers like to ask “no right answer” questions that actually do have right answers.

I had an interview that started with the hiring managers emphasizing how they value honesty and how their questions do not have any right answers. This sounded good since I had no reason to lie. Three questions in, they asked me, “if we hired you and then another job came along offering more money, would you take it?” Here is the dilemma to answering this “no right answer” question. If I said no, then I’m obviously lying since people have jobs primarily for earning income. If I said yes, then I’m disloyal, superficial and value money over “culture.” At the beginning of the interview they explained to me that they value honesty, I figured this question was some kind of a test, so I answered honestly “yes.” I realized that my answer was unacceptable as I saw a look of disgust and confusion come over the hiring managers faces. I felt like telling them, “I’m unemployed and I have to go to a food pantry to eat. Do you think I came here to be your buddy? Are you telling me that if someone offered you double of what you make, you wouldn’t take it for the sake of ‘loyalty’ and ‘culture’?” Needless to write, I didn’t get the job. These so-called “no right answers” questions seem to be common in job interviews. Hiring managers say that they want to know how the candidate thinks, but they really want to confirm that the candidate thinks just like them or an idealized version of them. Often, these “no right answers” questions are a method to filtering out candidates who don’t fit into their “culture”(see point #10). These kinds of questions are particularly ridiculous. Once I was asked, “how do you feel about bureaucracy?” Realizing the interviewer wanted to be patronized, I told him that I see bureaucracy as a challenge and an opportunity to innovate, blah, blah, blah… The truth is, like everyone else in the world, I dislike bureaucracy and rather not deal with it. Bureaucracy is a bad word. This is like asking, “how do you feel about bee sting or what are your thoughts on traffic jams?” A better way of asking the question would have been, “how do you handle bureaucracy?” But that way of phrasing the question would require the hiring manager to actually have enough empathy and compassion to put themselves in job hunters’ shoes.

4) Hiring managers disguise their attitude problems with being a “tough” interviewer.

I have come across too many cranky hiring managers. This has always been a waste of my time. Hiring managers try so hard to catch job seekers in a lie that they fail to listen to what the candidate is actually saying. It may seem obvious, but having an attitude problem is not an effective interviewing tactic. Interrupting someone in mid-sentence is disrespectful no matter what. Having a snide remark or an unnecessary comeback to a candidate’s response makes hiring managers look like a spoiled adult-children. Interviewers must not walk into an interview with a chip on their shoulders. If that is not possible, then they need to find someone else to do their interviews or seek psychological help because something is wrong with them. Hiring managers who believe that disrespect is an effective interviewing technique have been misguided. An interviewer can be tough and respectful at the same time. Some of the hardest questions I have been asked have come from the most polite interviewers. If companies want to miss out on good candidates, they can go ahead and disguise their rudeness as “tough.” Anyone with any self-respect would not want to work with them anyway. Clearly hiring managers haven’t learned the people skills they demand from job seekers.

5) Hiring managers do not read resumes.

This is related to point #1. This sounds obvious but HR departments and hiring managers do not read resumes. As a result I have gone very far in the interviewing process and been rejected from positions for reasons that should have screened me out earlier in the process. I always hear, “HR and hiring managers don’t have time to read each resume.” Understood, but interviewing people who are not qualified for jobs is also a waste a time. Also, I don’t have time to sit in traffic to spend hours out of my day interviewing for a job that I will never get but, guess what, I have to find a way to make the time because I need a job. Claiming “lack of time,” is another obvious signal of the lack of care and compassion they have for job hunters seeking better opportunity. When hiring managers reject a candidate for not having a specific skill, they could be lying (see #6). If that skill is so essential, then the candidate should not have been contacted to begin with. Their resume should have been disposed so everyone’s time would not be wasted. At one company, I went through three rounds of interviews and was rejected because I didn’t know how to use a specific tool. I asked myself, “why did it take so long for them to figure that out?” Soon after, a recruiter from a different company contacted me because my profile was a good match. I looked at the job description and I noticed that same tool was required for the position. This time I wanted to avoid wasting time so I told the recruiter that I was interested but warned him in advanced that I did not know how to use that specific tool but I have used similar tools and I learn quickly. The recruiter was fine with that and decided to move forward with a phone interview. After my warning, what was the first question he asked me? Do you know how to use that tool….. In addition, I have sent resumes making it clear that I wanted to relocate and then they were surprised to hear that I live 3000 miles away during the interview. Hiring managers need to read resumes and emails and don’t waste job seekers’ time.

6) Hiring managers are liars.

When I go through rounds of interviews and then the hiring manager tells me I didn’t get a job because of reasons that should have screened me out a lot earlier, I assume that they are either incompetent or lying. I tend to lean toward the latter, especially when they tell me that skill is not necessary during the interview multiple times. If hiring managers are going to lie, then they either need to learn to become a better liar or simply gain some courage and tell the truth. Hiring manager’s pride themselves on being able see through job seeker’s fabrications. Yet, so many of them blatantly and needlessly lie for reasons beyond me. I have been lied to about the requirements of the job, promised next steps, and follow-ups that never happen. I have no reason to lie because I’m secure with my knowledge and skill level. What are they so scared of?

7) Hiring managers do not provide feedback.

This is not big deal after a phone interview or a resume rejection. But if job seekers go through three or four rounds of interviews and talks to eight people, hiring manager’s should provide feedback for the reason(s) they got rejected. I have been rejected by so many jobs that I view some rejections as good rejections. These are rejections that include helpful feedback. Nobody likes rejection but constructive criticism can be helpful. If a person rambles, or doesn’t talk enough, or does not have the skills, or whatever the case may be, hiring managers should let the candidate know so that they become better interviewers. Will people still protest? Yes, but for many job seekers, feedback is very helpful and people appreciate the respect implicit within the bad news.

8) Hiring managers do not follow up when they say they will.

This is my number one irritation. After an interview, I am always told that someone will follow up with me within a certain time period, then they don’t. This means that I have to track the hiring manager down so that I can add their canned rejection to my large collection and then pin my hopes on the other 12 jobs I interviewed for. Often I don’t hear back at all. This is highly unprofessional and I have no idea how some of these companies stay in business when their hiring managers act this way. After all the hoops job seekers jump through, the least that hiring managers can do is be brave enough to follow up. If the interviewing process takes longer than expected, then the hiring manager needs to send an email saying that. As I said previously, a lie or a lack of feedback is not desirable, but any kind of follow up would be helpful. An update or a rejection should not take longer than 10 seconds. “You didn’t get the job, Thanks”. It took me about 2 seconds to write that previous sentence. If hiring managers are too busy or scared to follow up, then they should stop telling people that they will follow up. They should say something like, “don’t call us, we’ll call you.” Yes, it is an obnoxious phrase but it’s clear and, more importantly, it doesn’t create false hope.

9) Hiring managers are focused on the nonsensical idea of “cultural fit”.

People have this idea in their minds that hiring managers see hiring as the outcome of a process of cold calculation and rigorous, cost/benefit analysis. This is absolutely not true and there is no such thing as a meritocracy. Hiring and promotional decisions are based largely on emotion. This is especially true in the technology and creative industries where people are particularly pretentious. In job interviews, I have been repeatedly told that they want to make sure that I was the right “cultural fit” for the job or the “right fit for the team.” When I first started hearing this, I thought that they wanted to make sure that I was respectful and communicated well with others, which was no big deal. I figured it would be an easy test to pass since I am a pretty nice guy. But after dozens of rejections and watching people with less education and skill easily get hired, I figured out what “cultural fit” really means. It means that they only want to hire people who are part of their “in-group” and they are willing to hire less qualified candidates to fit this ridiculous standard. I learned that hiring managers value like-mindedness and personal connections to the candidate over professional qualities. This is one of the many complicated reasons why there is a lack of diversity in the technology industry. Many companies value the idea of “cultural fit” which is seemingly innocent. However, it becomes a problem for job seekers if the culture of every company in the industry is exactly the same. This means that if someone is not the right “cultural fit” for one company, then they are probably not the right “cultural fit” for the entire industry. As a result, qualified and ambitious people get shut out of entire industries while others flourish. It is not really racism or sexism in the traditional sense. But if hiring managers have the attitude that they are only going to hire people who are part of their “culture”, then it is no wonder why the people who work for these companies all look and act the same. It is no wonder why the tech and marketing industries are so homogenous. There have been numerous studies on how people with Black and Latino sounding names are immediately discarded. I don’t think that this is the only reason for the lack of diversity, but it is certainly one of the reasons. “Cultural fit” is the concept behind ageism as well because nobody wants to work with their parents. As CEO of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg famously said, “ Young people are just smarter.” People deemed as “too old” are automatically disqualified from positions for not being included in the hiring manager’s in-group. They only want to hire like-minded people who share the same preferences and past time activities. Max Levchin of Paypal famously rejected a candidate because he said that he likes to play hoops in his free time. I have been told that hiring managers choose candidates simply because they enjoy bar hopping at trendy night spots. I have read that hiring managers will tell you that “cultural fit” is important because they want to make sure the candidate would be happy at the job and the team would be happy with the candidate. A happy team works well together. But this is absurd. Someone is not going to derail the team’s happiness just because they like to play basketball in their free time. If drinking alcohol and bar hopping is important to hiring manager’s “cultural fit”, then they need to think about the reasons why someone might not drink. They could be recovering alcoholics, they could be training for a marathon, they could be devout Muslims, she could be pregnant, they could be allergic to alcohol, they just may simply not drink. But whatever the case, this has nothing to do with the job. The reason that the concept of “cultural fit” exists is because these companies are filled with pretentious, privileged people with sensitive comfort zones and scared to be around people who they perceive as different. It is a high school clique mentality that most of us abandoned when we were 17 years old. There are too many hiring managers that are well into their 20s and 30s who still divide the world into “bros”, “nerds”, “hipsters”, and other imaginary adolescent inspired categories. I believe “cultural fit” is the reason for many of my rejections, judging by seeing who these companies hire. Because of point #7, #8, and the general passive aggressiveness of hiring managers, I cannot know for sure but I have been rejected more than enough times to discover a predictable pattern. I once had an interview, where the hiring manager greeted me with a look of disappointment on his face. This was unexpected since we had a great phone interview. The in-person interview lasted only 10 minutes and only because I tried to keep it going. He was done with me after two questions and this is after I drove for two hours and paid for parking. So why the cold-shoulder? I presume his disappointment was because of my physical appearance in which he concluded that I was not part of his or the company’s “culture.” He treated me like he was a disappointed catfished victim. Maybe it was because of my athletic build (this makes me a “bro”, “jock”, or some other contrived, adolescent category, I guess?), maybe it was because I was “overdressed” (see point #10), maybe for other reasons completely beyond my control. For whatever reason, my time was wasted. “Cultural fit” creates contrived rivalries which are then unnecessarily used to filter out candidates. Many of these hiring managers are highly intelligent but act like spoiled pubescent teenagers. If they want to find the best candidate for the job then they need to grow up, be brave, drop the idea of “cultural fit”, and expand the requirements of the position to include more professional qualities, not superficial personal ones.

10) Hiring managers are uncomfortable with being around professional dressed people.

This is somewhat related to #9. In many industries, it is customary to dress professional for an interview. People traditionally put on their professional clothes when trying to make an impression. In most industries, this is to be expected but not in the technology and marketing industries where everyone is so casual. Because of the pretentiousness of the hiring manager, people who “overdress” for an interview often get disqualified no matter how smart and skilled they are. They see it as a sign of not being part of their “culture.” Aaron Swartz once wrote that suits “are the physical evidence of power distance, the entrenchment of a particular form of inequality.” Many people in the technology and marketing have the same sentiment. No disrespect to the late Aaron Swartz or his admirers, but do not say anything to me about “inequality” or “power distance” if you are wearing $300 jeans, $200 Jordans, driving a Tesla, living in the priciest parts of SF or NYC, while I bought my $60 suit from Marshall’s while on sale. Your smart watch and $300 headphones are more of a symbol of inequality than this cheap suit. People who wear professional clothes are trying to impress hiring managers, not oppress them. These are people who just want jobs. If professional attire is so offensive to hiring managers, then they need to tell candidates to dress casual when coming in for an interview. By doing so, the hiring manager won’t have to feel so uncomfortable and oppressed around professionally dressed people.

Epilogue

What this all comes down to is common sense and decency. If hiring managers follow these points, it will actually save them time and energy and help them find the right candidate more easily. I am dead serious about each and every job interview, phoned or in person. I spend time researching the job, the company, and the hiring managers. I have even parked in the parking lot just to see how the employees dress so I know what to wear to the interview. I arrive 15 minutes early, I give the hiring managers the very best of me, I send thank you letters when it is all over, and I am always disappointed when I get rejected. I go above and beyond and it doesn’t mean I should get every job that I interview for. If I am not qualified or the right (ugh) “cultural fit”, then so be it. But don’t waste my time. If I am unemployed, then this is not a game and there is a lot riding on whether I get the job or not. And if I am already (badly) employed, it’s even more true, because I have to take valuable time from work to talk to hiring managers. All I ask is for is for hiring managers to be sensitive to the plight of job seekers when writing the job descriptions and choosing who to interview. They need to use empathy and put themselves in the candidate’s shoes. For example, they should consider the following questions, “What if I had to take 3 hours out of your busy workday, spend money on gas, and parking just to be told that you weren’t the right “cultural fit” for the job? What if I had a head full of great ideas but my so-called “tough” interviewer was so rude and condescending, none of it got through? How would I feel if I couldn’t get the job of my dreams because HR is so ignorant of the position that they fail to realize that I am a perfect fit? What if my innocent pastimes, hobbies, or media preferences cost me a lucrative job? How frustrating is it to be blatantly lied to?” If hiring managers think about these things and it would make everyone’s life a lot easier.