The Way It Feels to Have to Fire Someone
(Taken from my audio diary recorded in real time.)
Today is the first day that I am actually going to let someone go. And it sucks.
It’s funny, I have this idea in my mind of these big ‘ol boss people who get a kick out of firing their employees. They call the person into the boardroom and sit there in their armchair, looking confident and authoritative with arms behind their head, and someone walks into the room with their knees shaking and they just say, “You’re Fired!”
No, I don’t think it works that way. At least not for me.
At this point, my business is small enough that I don’t have anyone on salary except for me, so technically it isn’t quite a firing, but I do have a lot of vendors and freelancers that I love working with. They’re so much at the heart of what makes this company and this team we’re building really great.
And because we’re so small, that greatness is very dependent on each person’s contribution. So lately, it’s become very clear to me that sometimes people just don’t fit. It’s not anything personal, it’s just the way the body of the organization works and how the energies and styles of everyone come together.
It’s amazing how hard it’s been getting to a place where I can be clear and neutral about this decision. I’ve known the answer for a really long time and I just keep ignoring the fact that it’s not working because I don’t want to face up to the fact that it’s really uncomfortable to tell someone that they don’t fit. It’s really hard to have to potentially deal with the emotional response that may happen.
I’ve criticized business people in the past for how seemingly calculated, cold, and bottom-line focused they are. I always used to think, “Where is the role of compassion in business? Where is the role of the heart in business?”
Holy moly! I’m learning now that it’s absolutely necessary to be able to do both. To include the heart, but to also include what might appear to be harshness. Sometimes, the most compassionate thing is to be able to bottom-line someone.
It isn’t compassionate to toy someone around and make them think they’re a right fit when they’re not. If you’re honest with yourself, they know it and you know it and everybody knows it — and nobody likes feeling incompetent and nobody likes feeling like they are disappointing someone and nobody likes feeling like they’re questioning whether or not they’re doing something right. It doesn’t feel good. And if I’m clear on what’s right for the company, for the team, I should make that be known. It’s really the more honest thing to do. And honesty in business is part of my integrity.
I want to be the kind of leader that operates with compassion and integrity — and sometimes what that requires is getting very clear, very cerebral, and slightly detached. Just enough to be able to say, “Coming from my truth, this isn’t working out. You don’t belong here. I’m letting you go.”
