Pond hockey for a pandemic (or how the NHL should come back)
A modest proposal on how the NHL can showcase in its game in a whole new, old way.
Ask a casual sports fan to name a hockey memory etched in their mind.
<list>Miracle on Ice.</list>
Yeah, I can see why the NHL is gung-ho on coming back.
From the inane (holding a June draft) for no other reason than pressing our collective mental refresh buttons (with the same fleeting impact) to the even more inane (finishing the season) in spite of the thousand logistical and illogical reasons not to, all is on the table.
I get it. This is the league with the weakest finances. It is the most dependant on gate-revenue and furthest on the fringe of the collective sports spectrum. The opportunity to be up-and-running before any other league? To hold an unprecedented monopoly of coverage with nary but an MMA fight or two to compete with? Oh, do I ever get it.
The latest plan is a 24-team, 2-city return format. Fine. It’s as par for the course as any other, so it’ll probably come to fruition. But what if…
Dreaming big
What if the NHL went for broke and took advantage of the world’s eyes being glued to their sport?
What if the plan was to tell a once-in-a-lifetime sports story?
What if they created a visual so impactful that it would be etched in the minds of sports fans forever?
What if they played an all-outdoors, all-playoffs across North America?
The (big) picture
The NHL has years of experience successfully hosting massively popular outdoor games. They have much of the logistics down and the appeal? Undeniable.
Leverage that expertise to the most remote and beautiful hubs you can find. Host those round robins and playoffs in gorgeous, touristy hot spots like Anchorage, Whitehorse, Lake Louise/Banff, Boulder, or the Labrador.
Take the game back to its pure, beautiful, outdoor routes and showcase it to a whole new world of starving sports fans.
Sunny reflections of mountainous backdrops on the ice with nothing but the visceral sounds of skates cutting ice and players yapping at each other… is there anything more iconic in imagery for the sport?
Why it works
With the caveat that none of these are perfect and without degrees of challenges, it’s actually plausible if timed and executed properly.
Climate: maybe not in the dead of July for Boulder or a defrosted Lake Louise, but cold enough regions where outdoor rinks can be maintained are prevalent in North America.
Neutrality of sites: no squabbling amongst owners over revenue and publicity.
Infrastructure: towns small enough to be off the CoVid hot spot radar but popular enough to house sufficient accommodations for a few teams and staff.
Fanless games: without stands (we are going for the picturesque all pond aesthetic here, coupled with all-new camera angles) both the host towns and teams without fan advantages will be acquiesced.
Experimentation opportunities: the possibilities for creativity and fun are limitless. Without stands and nets above the glass, why not have a ‘single puck per game’ policy and have hockey’s version of young tennis ball girls and boys race each other for pucks shot over the boards?
Simplified logistics: without concessions, fan shops, transportation, etc., far fewer employees would be required, which leads to, by far the biggest ‘why it works’…
Least risk: it’s simple math. The fewest people + the widest social distancing + the least time indoors = the least risk of contamination.
I’m in! Except…
With the caveat that I don’t personally endorse any return to action for a very, very long time (the risk simply isn’t worth it), ultimately I think the conservative nature of the league’s brains will never go for such a plan. The list of reasons not to is plenty long and plenty legitimate.
That said, if much of that list is going to require tackling regardless of the ‘how’ it all shakes down, why not? Now more than ever, a ton of slack is granted for experimentation.
Outside of an outbreak (which is being minimized as much as possible in such a plan), what’s the worst impact the NHL brand faces? I legitimately have a lot of trouble thinking up any lasting negative impact that couldn’t be excused by history’s most unique of circumstances.
If the NHL is set on coming back, wouldn’t it be nice to have a second hockey entry forever etched in those ‘100 greatest sports moments’ lists? With all of us desperate for something positive to cling to, don’t tell me the Stanley Cup being skated around a pond in the middle of the Rockies isn’t one of the most beautiful sports visuals ever.
I’ll certainly tune in and tell my grandkids all about the miracle of the return to ice.
