Dollars and Sense

How to Set Your Wedding Budget to Save Your Pocketbook (And Maybe Your Marriage)

Congratulations on your engagement! You’re probably staring at your ring and sharing the good news with family and friends. But don’t wait to start planning your I Do’s. Now’s the time to design a memorable event that won’t put you in debt.

According to wedding website TheKnot.com, the average wedding in 2013 cost $29,858! That’s not including the honeymoon.

The survey concludes the priciest place to marry is Manhattan, where the average couple shells out $86,916. I Do’s in Idaho are a lot more reasonable with the average couple spending $16,159.

Of the almost 13,000 brides and grooms surveyed, the average wedding has one hundred and thirty-eight guests; with the bride’s dress costing $1,281 and the groom’s tux totaling $248.

The survey’s most surprising result? About one out of every four couples doesn’t have a budget.

That needs to change. Every couple should have a budget. Large, small, or somewhere in between, a budget is a financial plan for your wedding, guiding your every purchasing decision.

Set a Budget

While it’s tempting to spend money freely, that’s not wise.

“You have to set a dollar amount right away,” says Lisa Sokolowski, who started the wedding blog A Bride on a Budget after she got engaged. “What you set and what you spend is probably going to be different.”

Often times you’ll spend more than you think you will. If you don’t set a budget you may overspend without even realizing it.

“The general rule of thumb is whatever you want to spend for your wedding, you’re going to spend probably twenty percent more,” says Sokolowski.

Prices can fluctuate in different areas of the country, such as a Miami wedding will likely cost more than one in Tulsa. A higher cost of living in a specific city can translate into a higher cost for services. Much like how gas prices range from city to city, prices for wedding services can vary too. Catering prices will be different based on what foods are available locally and you’ll have to pay labor fees for the banquet staff.

Don’t forget tax and gratuity too. These seemingly “extra” details add up fast. Plan to tip bartenders, waiters and members of the band about $25 each.

“Tip the employees, don’t tip the owner,” says Sokolowski, noting while you don’t tip the owners of the photo booth if they run it during your reception, you need to tip the photo booth employee who runs it in the owners’ absence.

Price Points

Feel like it’s more expensive to buy things labeled “wedding” compared to similar goods? You’re not wrong. A wedding markup does exist. For example, a simple white sheet cake for fifty people has one price if it’s for a birthday party and a higher price for a wedding, even if the cakes look alike.

Ordering a centerpiece from a florist? You’ll likely pay more because it’s for a wedding. That doesn’t mean you should lie when vendors ask your order is wedding-related. After all, the vendors may find out and can choose not to work with you.

You’ll also pay more for certain vendors or services. A high-end designer gown will cost a lot more than a gown from a department store and a highly experienced, award-winning photographer is going to charge more for photos than a beginning shooter. Despite the pricing variations, you can have a lot of great choices without sacrificing the style you want.

What Can You Afford?

You may or may not have a vision of your dream day but you need to start thinking of the things you want and don’t want at your wedding.

For example, do you envision wearing a simple dress or a tailored gown? Eating a nice dinner or a fancy meal? Dancing to a DJ or a band? How many guests do you want to host? An intimate group of thirty? Or a larger party for 200 guests?

Typically food and drinks are the most costly expenses for a wedding, especially if you host an open bar. Still you’ve got other price points to consider like flowers, invitations, photography, music and transportation.

By prioritizing your wants and needs, you’ll know what’s important to you, which can help you allocate your budget accordingly.

Guest List

The sooner you decide your guest list and know what kind of party you want, the easier it will be to figure out what your wedding can realistically be like.

While it’s early on in your planning to nail down a guest list, you need to at least have an idea of how many people you plan to invite. Here’s why: Cost of Wedding estimates each guest costs you between $164 to $201. Those head counts add up fast so if you need to trim expenses, cut the guest list.

With a shorter guest list, you’ll save on invitations, programs, food and drinks, as well as table décor like linens, favors and centerpieces. If you have a small guest list with fewer than fifty people, you can often book a venue’s private dining room, versus spending thousands on a ballroom that’s overpriced and too large for your event.

Who’s Paying?

Traditionally the bride’s family pays for the wedding but that’s not necessarily the rule anymore. Many couples pay for the wedding themselves or share the costs with the bride and groom’s families.

In many cases, certain family members such as godparents want to sponsor parts of the wedding, such as paying for the cake.

Creating a Budget

Track your budget anyway you want. Some couples use a computer and others simply log expenses in a notebook.

It’s best to set up a specific wedding account at your bank, including checks and debit or credit cards in both your names. This is a joint account that’s earmarked for wedding expenses only.

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“Dollars and Sense: How to Set Your Wedding Budget to Save Your Pocketbook (And Maybe Your Marriage)” is an excerpt from Weddings on a Dime: How to Plan Your Big Day Without Breaking the Bank, a Snippet by Kristen Castillo. Kristen is an Emmy award-winning journalist with over fifteen years of professional experience including covering features on weddings, health, and food. Click here for the full version of Weddings on a Dime: How to Plan Your Big Day Without Breaking the Bank, which includes wonderfully enriching audio and video content that will give more context about and confidence for wedding planning without the financial stress.