I am nearing the Holy mark of 30 in November this year. I am nervous as I think am not ready to be 30. I have to make more mistakes, more struggles and learn more. The notion that you cannot go wrong from here gives me sleepless nights. As my father says in his own style, ‘now you are 30, you cannot take chances any more. Build on what you have done so far but forget about adventurism.’ Perhaps he is right about it too.
Since childhood I thought 30 was the deadline to make it or break it, and now that I am nearby, I see the destination farther, heck I even don’t even know what destination means to me any more. I don’t know what is in the future for me, but I will never want another person to be in my position with such confused mind and cluelessness. Here are a few things I think you should do while still under 25 to be at a better place, at least mentally and emotionally.
In my early teen years, I was bullied by my classmates left right and center. Even though I always stood up for myself no matter what and indulged in many embarrassing fights, gradually I started to fear people and at one stage I was not able to make proper eye to eye contact. I always regret getting trapped by fear and retreating from any competitive environment. I failed to clear one entrance examination and I was scared again. I never applied for mainstream universities and colleges, because I feared of failing even though I knew I was good enough.
It take a lot of courage to admit there are a few areas where you are not good at. And it is not because you are pathetic but because your interest lies somewhere else.
I knew I was bad at science, always loved arts. I always felt confident in arts classes. I was teacher’s favorite. But in Science and Mathematics, I was below average. But I took science anyway in 12th board, just because I hadn’t known myself properly. And guess what, for the next two years I was making sketches in text books. Perhaps, choosing journalism was the best thing I ever did. Had I executed the process better, I would have prepared myself a lot better.