Beauty in between cracks.
The other day, I looked up the definition of “beauty.” Two things came up: “a combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, especially the sight.” The second one was “a beautiful woman.” I asked myself, what does that even mean? The perfect shape or form? That summer tan that a girl wears proudly on her skin? That toned body that is “aesthetically pleasing” to sight?
As we’ve grown up, society has made us believe that beauty equals perfection. That beauty can only be reached through tangible things. As I have been able to understand these concepts, I have questioned if that is what true beauty means to me? Forcing my fingers down my throat so I can see my ribs sticking out of my body? Or using that tight skirt and a crop top that makes me feel uncomfortable? Or hiding my track of tears with layers of makeup? We look for beauty in places we expect it to be found, when true beauty is hidden inside your authentic self and who you are. So then I asked myself again:
What is beauty? Where can we find it?
Beauty is a new member of the family, uniting so many people at once.
Beauty is the sound of waves hitting the sand.
The breeze I feel while lying down in the sun getting ready to take my usual long naps.
Beauty is in learning to love failure and seeking to be my imperfect self.
Beauty is the tears that roll down my cheeks on bad days.
But also the glitter that rests on my face while my mom opens her warm arms and consoles me.
Beauty is the delicious smell of fresh coffee with coconut milk that awaits me every morning.
Beauty is the family reunion where flashbacks help me relive old memories,
Where joy is uniquely found when grandparents, aunts, and cousins come back.
Beauty is in being vulnerable within a group of people you trust.
Beauty is in my grandma’s recipes,
The ones I try to copy to continue her legacy.
Beauty is not in makeup, but how much time Anita has spent trying to help me put eyeshadow on correctly to make me look presentable.
Beauty is in Andrea’s jokes and confidence that make me admire her.
In Ana’s words that fill her millions of freewriting documents with her ongoing thoughts.
Beauty is in Ale’s fingerpicking while she plays Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls on her guitar.
Beauty is in your tight hugs and forehead kisses that calm me down.
In feeling my heart beat faster than usual, as I spit the words “I love you” out.
Beauty is hearing my Beatles playlist, blasting across my room, making me feel like I’m living the actual concert.
Beauty is in toasting with seven glasses of virgin piña coladas in Mexico with my best friends.
It’s dancing on tabletops surrounded by the people I consider my second family.
Beauty is in blowing out the candles every year on April 8th.
Beauty is saying hello in the morning to a random stranger and them saying it back.
In feeling love and warmth through long hugs, smiles, and a simple touch.
We look for beauty in out-of-reach places.
Seeking unrealistic visions of perfection.
Maybe that’s not where true beauty tends to hide.
