How To Find Happiness
(Yes, the title is click bait, but I’m earnest in my intent to help you find happiness.)
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Humans are always seeking ways to obtain happiness. The pursuit of happiness is often considered the ultimate goal of life.
Sigmund Freud, wrote in Civilization and Its Discontents, 1930.
“What do men demand of life and wish to achieve in it? The answer to this can hardly be in doubt. They strive after happiness; they want to become happy and to remain so.”
The most common way people seek happiness is through the pursuit of pleasure. However, they quickly learn that repeated experiences of pleasure do not deeply satisfy, leading them to seek more intense experiences. These, too, fail to satisfy, and so people ultimately search for another way to find happiness beyond pursuing pleasure.
Aristotle wrote in Nicomachean Ethics, circa 340 BC.
“Happiness depends upon ourselves. More than anybody else, it is your decisions that will determine whether you attain the ultimate end of happiness.”
Rather than searching for things and experiences to make them happy, people slowly realize that the way to be happy is to choose to be content with what they have and how they are living. Learning to enjoy the present moment leads to deeper personal satisfaction. Living in the moment helps people find sources of deeper meaning in their lives.
Thich Nhat Hanh wrote in The Miracle of Mindfulness, 1975.
“The present moment is filled with joy and happiness. If you are attentive, you will see it.”
The desire to love rather than to be loved resonates with mature adults. Often, people at this level of spiritual development begin to live with a deeper sense of commitment to helping and supporting others.
Rabindranath Tagore wrote in Gitanjali, 1910.
“I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy.”
People who live to help others report a deeper sense of personal satisfaction than those who live solely for pleasure. However, the frustrations of loving and helping others can lead to world-weariness and personal burnout, which can result in depression and a sort of existential bitterness that can dominate a spiritually mature adult’s personality.
Martin Seligman wrote in Authentic Happiness, 2002.
“Using your signature strengths every day to produce authentic happiness and abundant gratification is the best buffer against depression.”
The spiritually mature person learns to find and enjoy the humor in laughing at themselves and the little absurdities of life.
Jon Kabat-Zinn wrote in Wherever You Go, There You Are, 1994.
“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
Ultimately, the most spiritually mature people align their lives with their perceived life purpose and adapt to live simpler lives devoted to helping others and doing what they feel they were born to do.
Dalai Lama wrote in The Art of Happiness, 1998.
“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.”
For them, life becomes a sort of child’s play. They daily take delight in the world around them, discovering, creating, and playing with their surroundings. Like children, they touch all creation with an attitude of love and respect. A sort of delight or joy radiates from them. They paradoxically seem to be both deeply wise and sweetly innocent, accepting life as it is. These are the people who live the happiest of lives.
Lao Tzu wrote in Tao Te Ching, circa 400 BC.
“A person with outward courage dares to die; a person with inner courage dares to live.”
Summary
In the pursuit of happiness true contentment comes from within. While people often seek happiness through pleasurable experiences, these fleeting moments fail to provide lasting satisfaction.
Happiness is found in appreciating the present moment and choosing contentment with one’s current life. Profound happiness is also found by serving others, and finding joy in simple acts of compassion and mindfulness.
By aligning with one’s life purpose and embracing a playful, childlike perspective, individuals can achieve a deeper, more enduring sense of happiness.
The attitude that Louis Armstrong displays in his song “What a Wonderful World” is a great example of what a happy person has.
Louis Armstrong sang in What a Wonderful World (1967)
“I see trees of green, red roses too, I see them bloom for me and you, And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.”
Sections of this article have been refined by AI to enhance comprehensibility and to provide facts that only online search engines would know. All personal statements were written by me and edited for spelling and grammar by ChatGPT.
© David Speakman 2024
