In retrospect, last October was the first time I filled out the Career and Digital Confidence Scales. To be fair to myself and get an impartial evaluation, I went with all the true answers, even though I desperately wanted to pick better ones. As I had expected, I scored below average on measures of career self-efficacy and digital competency.
The end result left me feeling depressed and bad. I make an effort to prevent myself from becoming overwhelmed by my bad feelings. My inner monologue echoed the sentiment that now was the moment to seize the potential for change and make some headway on the issue.
Since then, I’ve stopped running away from my problems and instead started exploring their root causes. The constant fear of failure and the criticism of others make it hard for me to see my own flaws, which I believe contributes to my low self-efficiency score. Because of this, I didn’t procrastinate and immediately contacted my academic advisor. I opened up to her about my predicament and emotions, and we worked together to develop a strategy for overcoming my fear of failing. As time went on, I learned some of the foundational information, networked with others already engaged in the field of my interest, and started constructing some of the skills I had neglected. There were times when I just wanted to quit, but I knew I had to force myself to keep going.
Without realising it, I had transformed into a more capable, assured person who was making steady progress on my assignment. As the second round of the questionnaire drew near, I found that I was no longer as bewildered and helpless as I had been at the outset. I was able to make more confident decisions. As I hit the “submit” button on this survey, a pleasantly warm current surged within me and slowly made its way to every part of my body, like the sun spreading over me. At that moment, I knew that the darkness had left me.
Finally, I’d like to use my own experience to encourage those who are still lost and hurting by saying that the road to growth and discovery is not always smooth; the process will always encounter various problems and troubles, but that you should still be brave enough to change and not run away. You’ll realise that the challenges you’ve faced have shaped you into the person you are now and that you’re better for having gone through them. and no matter how long the night, the sun will always rise in the morning.
