#72: The Book of Joy: Lasting Happiness in a Changing World by Dalai Lama XIV, Desmond Tutu, and Douglas Carlton Abrams.
Every so often in life, a book comes along that you were not expecting to read, nor were you particularly drawn to it at any point, but the lessons therein are exactly what you needed to hear. This world is crazy right now, so much so that my cover-everything answer will now just be “2020”. Forgot to pick up bread from the store? 2020. Car has a flat tire? 2020. Don’t have that hyper specific tool in your kitchen to make puff pastry from scratch? 2020, man. It’s rough. This book is a calming rain full of warmth and joy to pull you out of that sad 2020 downward spiral into an appreciation for the world around you.
Don’t believe me? After all, how can a book bring about such change in a world marred by so much darkness? By changing your perspective. As I just finished this book less than 12 hours ago, I cannot say how permanent these mind-set changes may be, but for right now, I’m feeling pretty at ease despite not having a consistent form of income, no place to really live long-term, and continuous arguments with my family.
I began this book somewhat tongue in cheek. Oh yes, please, religious leaders of the free world who have never had to work a waitressing job in their lives. Please tell me about joy. I take back my snark. All of it. I will eat crow (I think that’s how the saying goes) because these men, the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Tutu have known PAIN. They’ve known suffering to a degree that I could never imagine and they’ve learned not only to move past it, but thrive. I would say, “Thrive despite suffering” but they made a point in the book that they thrive because of their suffering.
Let’s describe the book, shall we? Opening on a special day Dharamsala (The Dalai Lama’s place of residence and the home of many exiled Tibetans), the plane with Desmond Tutu lands and the two friends are reunited with much affection and honor. From there, the book is a transcript of the next week. Through much work-around, these two highly active men are allowed a small reprieve and the chance to spend an entire week together while they are interviewed and filmed as they discuss the aspects of joy in our fallen world. Their points of view agree more often than not and, while they have different backgrounds and belief systems, they are the type of friends everyone wishes they could be. Teasing, mocking, self-deprecating humour, and then affection are constantly taking turns with serious conversations. It almost gives you FOMO. How amazing would it have been to be a fly on the wall? Good news, read this book and BE that fly.
There’s so much wisdom in this book. From the exiled lifestyle the Dalai Lama lives to the post-apartheid lifestyle the archbishop lives, we get a glimpse into their beautiful spirits of forgiveness and compassion. While a lot of their advice to the book is common sense (ie, think more of others than yourself, to break the downward spiral of anxiety; forgiveness is the path to freedom, but don’t be foolish and ignorant about wrongs; etc), it’s really nice to have it all laid out in an enjoyable format. Once I got into the rhythm of the book, which took a few chapters, I’ll admit, the book flowed beautifully. I almost felt like I should be drinking tea and gazing into a flower bed while I read. There should be the sound of birds in the distance and a wam sun at my back. That’s what reading this book was like. A breath of fresh air mixed with a hint of gardenias.
The last section of the book, though, can be skipped. Unless you have a strong desire to meditate and follow the Buddist principles of detachment, you can honestly skip the whole thing. It almost felt like a let down at the end. Here were are reading wisdom, knowledge, and the beauty of two souls as best friends and then, boom, we are picking up a “Breathing Techniques for Dummies” book. I didn’t think it was necessary at all. That being put aside, I thought this book was a wonderful read and it would do the world good to take a look at it right now.
