The dark side of (solo) traveling/ moving around.
I love traveling more than anything. Getting the rush from the moment you book a ticket, getting on a plane,a train,bus,what have you, till the point you are getting into the vibrant city center of your destination. I know that the moment I am getting on that plane(let's assume you are traveling by plane;)) I am free. Leaving the little problems that were f*ucking with my head, leaving the routine, the comfortable and known for something new, adventure, meeting new people,making new friends, boyfriends or lovers. The moment you get to experience atmosphere of a new city or city you have not visited in ages, is the best. When you sit in a bar, order a glass of amazing wine, pint of beer or a cold cocktail, get some good national food and just sit there, chill and enjoy the life as it was meant to. No phones, no laptops, no updates. It's the time to be with yourself, think, look, absorb. Feel the power different city has on your psyche.
And don' t get me started on meeting new people, hearing new stories, learning new stuff. Every single day is special- like from a book of adventures. You wake up and have no idea what is going to happen.Maybe it will be just an ordinary day. But maybe you will meet a person who will become your very close friend.Maybe you will ask for a lighter and meet a guy you end up dating(sure that can happen back home, but really - just how open are you in your comfortable environment;)) The excitement when you start to explore the city, go to the beach and just chill,drink wine while watching the sunset or just go with friends to the beach(if you end up in a warm country with a beach.my favorite btw.:D) Awesome,no?
But there are some dark sides when you travel all the time. Peopleusually don't like to talk about it, because there is so much good happening.And one just doesn't feel like being the one to bring the party down. But when you travel and/or move around a lot, you start to feel that you don't belong anywhere.Which most of the times can feel really good and freeing. But sometimes, you feel like the loneliest person in the entire world. And you may be surrounded by people you know, in the bed with your (newest) whatever guy,but you still feel like something is missing. The feeling of having a stable ground under your feet,maybe? Or need to belong somewhere and not be on the run all the time. Who knows. But I can tell you it happens. A lot.
Loosing touch with people who were (maybe still are) important in your life. Now I am going to be very honest. When you move around and live a life not very comparable to people you were once friends with, it will change the relationships. Maybe in a good way, maybe in a bad, but most probably in both ways. From my personal experience I know, that I had a connection with a lot of people I thought would be in my life for a very long time. But you see, you learn each and every day, that nobody will stay in your life the whole time. It's just you and your ability to learn to let go. It hurts like hell, to loose people you cared deeply about. But they don't see you as the same person they knew. And it's okay. Because you are not. They are not. Years change people, whether we like it or not. Just stay true to yourself and everything will be fine. Eventually.
Your heart will be broken.So many times. Do I need to say anything else?
You wil break hearts. Unless you are person people can't stand, you will leave people behind that cared deeply about you. From your family when you decide to leave your home, to your friends and (boy/girl)friends.
You may have the best sex ever, but then you or the other person is leaving.Moving on. And maybe you will promise to each other that you will meet again,even for just one steamy night. But guess what. Life happens. And unless you are a main character from a very predictable movie, you won't accidentally meet again ordering ice-cream somewhere in LA(or whatever movie scene:))
You become very nostalgic.Certain songs will remind you of a place/person/season. You will get flashbacks out of the blue. Memories from the time you were here or there. Maybe you will, like me, feel sometimes that you are 80 years old and you lived through it all.:D
You will feel like you belong everywhere and at the same time nowhere. Each and every place will become your new home(to be clear, I am talking about being somewhere for more than a few days:)). And each time you are about to leave, your heart will break a little. And you might think that after some time it will get easier. But it won't. You just learn how to handle yourself and move on, if possible.
But despite all of that, I would not change the life I live at the moment. Meeting new people, discovering places, learning new things about myself all the time, growing. Remember that traveling is the only thing you buy, that makes you richer. So forget about that new phone or whatever gadget, new fancy smancy dress and just book a ticket to whatever place you never been and go. Go alone- at least once. Look for your inner peace, focus on yourself and where do you want to go next. Come back home and you will feel the difference.I can promise that.
Bon voyage ;)