I first encountered pornographic images in early 2015.I had a new phone and the internet was cheaply available.I was lucky that the cheap chinese smartphone could not download videos and I was too scared to download porn videos at the cyber cafe. The pornographic images had little effects on me for I did not masturbate or think about masturbation.
Fast forward to October 2016 where I had access to a free fast internet connection . Porn did not interest me because I had no girlfriend and was too busy worrying about my life.
While walking to school on a Monday, I saw a big curvy butt woman who wore tight skirts.Lust come upon.I remember I had easy access to such images and films.I downloaded two porn films before class commenced.I encrypted them out of fear of being discovered and embraced, I never recovered them.
Nonetheless I was determined to watch a full make out session.On the day that followed I downloaded one porn film and hid it smartly.Later that evening I watched the porn film on repeat.My pants got wet and I really liked the feeling.
I added to my collection over the week.I found myself home alone on the Sunday and I decided to watch all of my new favourite films.One thing led to the other and I masturbated for the first time at 20 years of age.The feeling was unexplainably good.As you probably think I jerked off for a second time.
I began fantasizing with random skimpy outfit women I saw on the streets.The first three months were breathtaking.
A feeling of guilt come upon me.I waged a war against masturbation and it always emerged victorious.
I now had a Wiko K - kool smartphone,fast, reliable and modern.The internet speeds in Kenya are insanely fast and affordable.
I discovered porn gifs and downloading full porn films was easy and fast.Tumblr porn did not let me down.
Slowly but surely it became a norm in my life and I hated it.I tried o many occasions to stop it but ... I masturbated because I felt angry and hopeless.Sadness and depression due to other events in my life made it worse.
I turned to God for help. I remembered David and Goliath and how God fights your battles if you call upon Him and let Him have His way.I began having chains of prayers.I wrestled with the problem for three months.
Early April the problem got worse, I even ejaculated in my sleep.I work up on a Sunday morning wet and tired.I cried out to God and got saved in my room.I was directed to a 10 day challenge without masturbation.It worked.I tell you the truth.
Jesus Christ is the answer.
I quit watching porn.It’s been four months now.
I acknowledge that it is God that made the giant fall.Jesus Christ strengthens you in all your endevours.God made my masturbation giant fall,He too will make yours fall.Call upon the Lord and you shall be saved.
Trust in God.
God is pleased with those who humble and repent, those who obey Him and fear Him.
God loves you and loathes the sin, cast your burden unto Him for He cares for you.Repent and turn your back on sin.If it is had to turn away from your sins ask Him to help you for He is our sustainer, Lord of Heavens and of the earth.
God loves you.
Thank you
Joseph Maina Karimi.
