The Fears We Need, Not The Ones We Deserve
One question I ask myself sometimes is how can I get over those anxious thoughts that spill out unlikely negative scenarios? Here is a 2 step algorithm:
Step 1: Have some unrealistic, anxiety related fear. Easy.
Step 2: Have Bigger realistic fears! Much, much bigger. Fear the A.I. singularity, global warming, things far beyond your control. Occupy yourself with those fears instead of wasting your time worrying about your own inner fears. Work towards those bigger fears, you might not solve them in your life time, but hey, you might not even face them.
But should we have fears at all?
We make up fears when we don’t have any. We fear loss when we have something valuable, and we fear commitment when we feel we have nothing to lose. We fear failure and push ourselves away from it, but we also fear success, and the price we may have to pay for it. We fear missing out when we aren’t on our social networks, yet we fear judgement and inadequacy when we put ourselves out there.
We fear dying without having done what we wanted, and we fear living too long to not be able to do anything. We fear life as much as death, we fear love as much as hate. We fear taking risks as much as walking down the beaten path. We fear we don’t have much potential, and we fear we are not working up to our full potential.
Fear is inevitable, so it seems. If that is the case, then we should at least get to pick our fears. We should cherry pick the ones we can deal with, and that requires more self discovery. If we can’t control our fears, then we should occupy ourselves enough to not think about them.
Fear motivates life as much as it hinders it. So fear not fear. Use it, control it, and it can be as useful to you as it has harmed you.