Dressing For Who?

I’ll admit it, I have fallen victim to the crop-top fad. I’m not all into super short tops that bear a lot of skin, I prefer just a peek of the belly (As my example on the left shows). I’m into the craze, but I do it on my terms- as all fashion should be approached.

I wasn’t always into crop-tops. For a while I actively spoke out against them. I thought it was a horrible fad that would die out soon enough. And then on Christmas day a few years ago, I got my first crop top. It was from my mother of all people. I didn’t own any high-waisted shorts at the time- as I said before, I like to keep some modesty- so the shirt hung in my closet for a while. And by a while I mean over almost a full year.

Last year I went through a self-revolution and lost over 40 pounds. With the lost of the weight came the loss of my wardrobe and so I was forced to invest in new clothes. That was when I decided to take a risk, and buy a pair of high waisted jean shorts. (They’re pictured above) I haven’t looked back since.

Back to present day, this spring/summer is the first time I’ve started to really wear the combo (thanks to the sales of summer clothes during the winter). I just recently got the crop top pictured above from Forever 21 and had been dying to wear it. So on a hot February day, it was in the 80’s, one of my best friends and I decided to go to a local theme park. Just in case it wasn’t as hot as we expected, I brought along a light, long sleeve cardigan to leave in the car.

The day we spent together was amazing. We went on rides, got treats and even got flirted with a few times. Best part- I didn’t feel anyone judging or staring at me for what I was wearing. It felt great. Stopping for some Menchies, by the time we returned back to our area; the sun was down and it was cold. So I slipped on my cardigan and didn’t think one thing of it. Once I returned home, still very much covered up, my older sister made a flat out comment asking about where the rest of my clothes were.

I didn’t get why she had to ask the question. She doesn’t like or approve of the crop top fad- but I don’t care. There’s a lot about me my sister disapproves on. The other night I was about to take a shower, standing in the bathroom in jeans and a typical cami I wear underneath my shirt. She asked for my help to hook something up to one of our TVs, so I went and helped her. As I’m in the middle of working, she comments on how my cami is “see through” and is “inappropriate”. I responded back with, the fact that I was about to go take a shower so I wasn’t fully dressed. Her response? “I don’t care, it’s still inappropriate.”

This battle we’ve had is a long raging one. The link in the paragraph above will further prove it. I’ve battled a long time with my own self identity and being who I want to be rather than being who others want me to be. At my current age (going by year and month) my sister was pregnant with her son. I’m in my last semester of CC for my AA to transfer. She loves tablecloth looking lace on clothes; I hate it. I love my heels and fancy dresses; she despises them both.

We have different styles and taste. And so though I don’t ever say anything to her (but I could because I have a ton of snarky comebacks I keep to myself); I have to ask myself this: Who am I dressing for? A huge part of anyone’s self identity is how they chose to dress. So if I chose to fall victim to her comments as I once did, then I am no longer dressing for myself. I am no longer myself. In figuring this out, I also figured out I don’t give a damn to whether my sister likes my outfit choices or not. If I chose to wear a party dress, heels or even a crop top- who is she to judge me? I only believe there is one who has the credentials to judge anyone and He is not on this Earth.

This is for anyone out there, who feels the same way. If you ever feel judged by a stranger, or even more so a family member, because of what you wear ask yourself who are you dressing for? Are you trying to fall into their sense of style or your own? I hope you’re doing it for yourself. And if you’re not, then start. Because who gives a damn if another person approves of something for your life?

Go dress for yourself.