The Power of Healing
I remember the first month of being a single woman that just got off from a year and three month long relationship. It was awful. I thought I was already fine not until my friends and I decided to party in the city where my ex lives. I cannot even fathom the fact that I’m passing by the usual route I used to take when I was about to go to his place, the places we’ve been to, the streets where we kissed and held hands and the restaurants we had those lovely conversations. At that moment, everything came back to me like a huge blow in my face trying my best to hide my tears from my perky self in front of my friends. It was really not the best feeling, ever. I tried to desensitize myself from this place but it’s just not working for me at that time and solemnly promised I will never hang out around that city again. I remember heading home that night just shaking my head, like I did something completely stupid, like I just licked those wounds fresh.
A year or so later, I am here again, in this same city. I appreciate long commutes so I decided to take one this time. I passed through the same route, the same buildings, the same restaurants, the same streets where I fell in love with this human being, whom I allowed to break my heart, and I felt nothing but happiness, serenity and astonishment that I feel…well…peaceful. I didn’t even had that flinch of bitterness. I can now honestly say that I’ve healed from the pain.
To you who’s trying move on right now, I know how much you’re hurting. I’ve been there so many times and please, you don’t need to be hard on yourself. Don’t pretend you’re already fine when you know deep inside you’re not. Moving on doesn’t have a fixed timeline, it all depends on us. Some takes years, some takes months, some even takes days to move on from someone so don’t hurry. I remember myself waking up feeling a little hopeful compared to the past days and that’s when I’ve finally made a decision to let go of everything and start taking care of no one but myself. I’ve neglected myself for the longest time. I’ve always thought of others first before myself and because of that I’ve devastatingly lost myself. It’s when I started to really listen to what I want, to what will make me happy, to know what matters to me most, to know what I really really REALLY want is the moment when the healing process begun. Well, that’s for me. It’s up to you to decide what works for you. Look at what healing brought to me, a heart full of hope and love. It’s also when I knew how much my worth is. And that, my friends, is the most important thing. Remember, no one can pull you down if you know you’re worth.
Moving on is a tough process but it’s the thing that makes us feel alive. Embracing the pain will make the pain itself go away. You’re not doing yourself any favor if you continue to run away from it — it will just keep on running catching after you and trust me you don’t want that vicious cycle. And no, you will not be broken forever. And yes, that feeling is only temporary. Trust me — one day, you will wake up realizing the person who broke you into pieces doesn’t bleed into you anymore. Trust me. It. Will. Eventually. Happen.
Listen, just think of it this way and focus on what I will say next — — this pain you’re going through right now will make you even stronger. You’re still alive right? Heart beating? Then you’ll be fine. This experience is an opportunity for growth. Have that mindset. :)
To you who’s trying to forget someone — — you can do this. YOU CAN. You have a choice, choose to live and love yourself a little more. You can do this. Xoxo
Originally published at apesdangereuxdoux.tumblr.com.
