August 2 — Karaoke

Andrew Collins
Aug 24, 2017 · 1 min read

I always feel it in my chest when I sing in front of more than five or ten people. In the hour leading up to singing I felt tired. I wanted a drink but I was too cheap to pay for one. I could rally, I thought. I could push through and summon those last reserves of energy that hadn’t been sapped by the day’s 9-hour drive. Everyone at our table seemed muted, as if going out for karaoke was slightly forced fun. This didn’t help matters.

As my song drew closer my heart began to beat. Three more to go. Two. One.

“Is Andrew Collins here?” The DJ called me up. I’d been regretting picking a song like “The Middle” by Jimmy Eat World, but I pushed the feeling aside. I pushed it all aside. I stopped caring and started singing and dancing.

The bar raised a collective cheer as the music began. My voice felt tight at first. I was trying to control it too much, and it strained from the effort. One guy in the back was pointing at me and singing along enthusiastically. That was all I needed. I imagined I was on stage at a real concert. Movement. Music is movement. I was in motion.

At the guitar solo in the bridge I broke into a feverish air guitar. Why not? It was fun, and I knew she would like it.

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Andrew Collins

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Lumberjack by day. Editor of Grassroots Pulse on the side. Writer and Jesus-follower at all times. If things were simple, word would have gotten around.