i want to love you, but i’ve no time

i know the geometric shirt with the ruffled sleeves would fit fine

against my pale skin

but i know your desperation to show affection will latch, soak

into my pores, absorb into skin, cling to my ankles desperate

to be hauled wherever i find myself

and you are not the problem

there are mountains i need to climb,

there is music i need to submerse within,

there are cultures i need to soak up,

and with the weight of commitment hand in hand with the threat of the time bomb weighing me down

my years will divide twice

the self concept is a constant journey

and with 70 years left

you don’t know me

i don’t know me