I perfectly see your point. By the way you put it, it seems you haven’t totally overcome the loss and the word “loss” is intended as one thing that exited your life, leaving a hole.
I recently broke up with my wife, even if our separation and soon divorce has been talked over by the two of us, pondered a lot and analyzed. We came to the conclusion that we didn’t love each other anymore, so we decided to split, but to remain good friends, which we are as of today. We still help each other in hard moments and like to have coffee together from time to time. But each one of us processes the loss following a breakup in a different way. She healed faster than me, while sometimes I find myself alone in the room I live and willing to cry.
But tears don’t come easy now. The worst has been left behind.
The good thing is that I can dedicate way more time to my writing and it is a way, as you say, to not think about the breakup, the loss.
Keep the good writing going and stay happy and fine.