Beijing and I

My name is Aby (Amandine), I am French and I came to Beijing for the first time in 2013, following my ex-boyfriend. He had to come here study at the Jiatong University for a scholar year.

My first 3 weeks in Beijing were pretty much awful. I literally lived what they call “the cultural shock”. I felt every step of this shock through everything: the flat, the people, the language, the culture, the pace of life… It was just so different than anything I knew.

After one month struggling living in this new environment, I noticed a job offer about photography teaching at a French school. I told myself I had to seize that opportunity, and this is how I met Caroline, the “Zerodistance” French association’s director. Meeting her was like fate, as if my story in Beijing started at this point.

Being part of this association made me realize that, despite all my doubts, I could succeed here. I could make something positive for me and others at the same time. That gave me self-confidence and helped me to get my inspiration and my creativity back in business.

After 6 months of thriving and blooming in this job and Beijing, I had to go back to France. This is when everything changed in my mind…

It was right after the last drama class I gave in this Chinese primary school. There was this cute 9-year-old little girl (my favourite one actually, even if we didn’t speak too much). We know how Chinese people are used to hide their feelings, right? Well, after timidly saying goodbye to me, I was about to leave when I heard her calling my name. I turned around and she was running towards me, then jumped into my arms to hug me strongly and sincerely. She touched my heart and I felt her love during this meaningful hug. I realized that despite every occidental thought and cliché about the Chinese, they can be human beings just like us.

At this very moment, I knew I was falling in love with China.

My trip back to south of France, where I was born, was even worse than the cultural shock I experienced in Beijing. Most of the people feel lucky and happy to leave here (also because of the amazing weather) and I like it too, but I did not feel complete. I felt like I do not belong here anymore and I have found my place somewhere else.

So I took the decision that was about to change my life forever: give everything up in France to settle down in Beijing. The city where I feel free to take my life into my own hands, where I feel like everything is possible and where it is definitely not enough to look at the tip of the iceberg.

Because there is so much more to see, so much to live!

Always yours,
Aby(-LiveIcanFly)