Thank you for this. I struggled with all of that for a long long time. I was born chubby and despite playing sports and eating healthy, I always have been bigger than everyone else.

Throughout my whole life I felt like I was lacking something — becasue I was fat, I would never be good enough so I have to make up for it by being smart and funny or otherwise no one will want to talk to me.

I moved away from my home and slowly started to realise that I am a valuable human being. It took me 5 years of being away to start acecepting myself and being able to look at myself without disgust.

Recently I managed to get home and tell my mother all about this. She cried, blaming herself and I felt terrible. But she needed to know. She needed to know that not every conversation she has with me should be about how I have to lose weigth and how unhealthy my life is (despite her being thousands of miles away and not having a faintest idea of how my everyday life looks).

I am trying to become immune to all the comments I hear and do what is best for me. All I want to do is be healthy. I don’t have to be skinny, I don’t have to fit the norm. I just want to feel like I am taking care of myself.

I think until you start accepting yourself, your life is going to be a constant battle. For me it’s all work in progress. But now I know that I’m not worth less becasue of the way I look, I am not damaged goods.