I love what I have read so far from you. I loved this too.
But woman to woman, when I read this , I wanted to point something out.
From years of hard lessons.
I find that in every relationship, I did get something out of the deal, and when I find out what it was, and how exactly it served me, it does me a world of good and helps me in the future , make better relationships.
Did this man serve your ego? Did he make you look good? Did he enhance the image you hold of yourself? How did he communicate for you, to the world? What did he tell the world about you, that you want the world to know? Did he make you safe? From what? Did he allow you to rest or settle for less? Did he fill up an empty space somewhere, where?
Every relationship we choose to enter in, serves us in some way. It’s just that we don’t really want to look at those parts that they serve. We don’t want to admit they exist. Being the damsel in distress sometimes , is exactly the point.
Sometimes we need people to bring out our vurnenability , our soft spots , maybe at times , we are unwilling to show the world our belly, unless we are hurt.
Find out how he served you. While in it, while out of it.
It will only do you good..
And also, that is what hurts about it. Like the part he served in us. Is the part that hurts the most when they leave.
Like our ego. We date a man because he looks good. And our egos get blown up, and when he leaves , it’s our vanity that kills. The death of ego, painful shit.
But when we get to identify these things, we grow. Don’t make the same mistake again. We find out what drives us to be with certain men, or what is truly lacking in ourselves , what is really picking our mates. Next time we are aware of it and next time we don’t date the guy that looks good, we give maybe the men who don’t look as good a chance , because we’re more aware of what we don’t need.
Idk.. it was just a cool thing I learned a while ago. There is always some way they serve us. They worked for us. That’s what we gotta find ..