Why do you want women to dress with charity and charm (and the other words you use)? Is there a Biblical basis for that?
Is human sexuality good and beautiful — or is it meaningless? Why?
If it can be good and beautiful — and meaningful — can it also be misused and abusive?
I grew up around an ethic that we joked about as, “Sex is dirty. Save it for the one you love.” The world’s response was something like “Sex is to be worshipped. Expend it anywhere-anytime.” I can appreciate much of your piece — but think you conflate too many issues.
Would you walk down the street with your penis hanging out? Why or why not? It’s just a piece of tissue. What’s the difference between it and your bare ear?
What is the difference between writing “sit” and “s*it?” Does the Bible forbid either?
These are all cultural forms. We give meaning to what a bare nipple means. But does that mean it is meaningless?
It is easy to challenge any particular cultural form and ask, “Did God ever demand________________?” For example, “Does the Bible command men to buy a woman a diamond ring before marriage?” And we can tear it all down to meaninglessness. Our current culture has become very proficient at this process of rendering all things as having no inherent worth or value.
The hard thing is to then work out cultural forms where we can elevate the meaning of human life and sexuality to something worthy of being called “good,” “beautiful,” and “sacred.”
Whatever that form is — do you think it is likely the most “good” if it is “new.” In other words, if we cast off all meanings around clothing and decided body paint and putting cigarette butts in our ears was most wonderful — would we then be more free?
The idea of modesty simply relates to moderate. In between an ethic that denies sexuality and one that hyper-idolizes it — is a sexuality that operates within parameters. It is a sexuality that has a “time” and a “place.” It is wise. It is beautiful. It is good. It is moderate.
It accepts the language of the culture. How we dress and our body language all has meaning. Taking a person’s hand does not have an inherent meaning. But we give it meaning. Explaining to a girl or boy that wearing a tuxedo communicates something different than wearing a swimsuit is not blaming them for somebody deciding to hurt them. That conflates issues.
Yes we have double standards and have projected blame onto women for the behavior of men. That does not mean that women should see themselves as powerless, meaningless, and not responsible for what they communicate with words, dress, behavior and non-verbals. To do so would render their lives worthless.
