White noise
This is a long overdue post
This is one post I have been wanting to write for many years, a decade, to be precise. I did write some blog posts during this period, not as frequently as I used to, but never got down to writing this one. Maybe I wasn’t prepared enough, also, I got busy writing stories, but recently when I posted a question on my Instagram story asking people whether they have any inferiority complexes, one of the answers I got made it extremely difficult for me to keep delaying this post any further.
I had taken a screenshot of that response, but sadly, I lost it, thanks to the countless pictures I click and delete. In haste, I probably deleted that screenshot as well. I, therefore, cannot quote the answer, and can only paraphrase it. The answer stated: Yes, I have an inferiority complex, I have Vitiligo and it makes me feel inferior to other people.
I read that response and I wanted to respond to the person immediately, but then I thought I would write this post and dedicate it to that person. So, here’s dedicating this blogpost to this awesome human being, who inspired me to write this blogpost. Also, please know that I am virtually hugging you through this post, so I deserve a hug back. Read the whole post to understand why you should not feel inferior to anyone just because you have a skin condition.
I don’t expect you to know what Vitiligo is, we don’t hear the word often, we probably have heard its commonly used variants like “white patches” or “white spots”.
What is Vitiligo?
“Vitiligo is a chronic (long-lasting) disorder that causes areas of skin to lose color. When skin cells that make color are attacked and destroyed, the skin turns a milky-white color.
No one knows what causes vitiligo, but it may be an autoimmune disease. In people with autoimmune diseases, the immune cells attack the body’s own healthy tissues by mistake, instead of viruses or bacteria.”
The above is as explained by the National Institute of Arthritis and Musculoskeletal and Skin Diseases. To read more, please click here.
What do people make of Vitiligo?
The paranoia around these “white patches” has been so deep-rooted that we have grown up with the fear of developing them. The mental conditioning starts right from the time you are born, with many superstitious beliefs around the skin condition. Many toddlers are not fed fish when their primary diet comprises milk because according to one legend, eating fish and milk together could cause this “dreaded” condition. A society usually obsessed with white skin treats people who have “white patches” on their skin as if they are aliens, some even are scared to get close to them, believing that it’s contagious, which it is not, please read more about it here.
Our standards for beauty have taken years to shape, we have now created a monster out of these unreasonable and unrealistic standards. Anyone with less than perfect shape, size or color feels inferior. It is now time to break away from our definition of beauty and be more inclusive. The rigid standards of beauty are harming people, especially those who have medical/chronic medical conditions - they have many other things to deal with, like medicines, treatments and the side effects of those, the doctor visits and not to forget the cost associated with it all, let’s not burden them with our superficiality!
Why did I want to write about Vitiligo and why am I writing about it now?
I was in school and I had a junior, tall, pretty and extremely confident. One summer she came back from vacation and I saw some white patches on her leg. I’m not sure if those patches affected her confidence, but it shook mine. I remember thinking about those for days together. I completely stopped having any dairy product with fish and would stare at every person who had the skin condition, finally realizing that I was perhaps making them feel uncomfortable by my unsolicited stares, so those stares turned into peeks but I continued to look at them. The paranoia became weaker as time passed by, but it never left a remote corner in my mind.
Later, when I was working in Mumbai, my best friend was in town for some training and she invited me over for dinner. Her mom had made finger-licking delicious food. Them being Bengali, there was no way I wasn’t going to be served fish. After the scrumptious meal, they served me ice cream. I started sweating, I didn’t want to offend them over a baseless legend I so religiously believed in. I convinced myself that it was chocolate ice cream and only white dairy products would cause the skin condition. But after I returned home, I could not stop thinking about it and kept checking my face and body for white spots for the next week or so.
This was a one-off instance, and by and large, the thoughts did not trouble me much until I decided to get married.
A positive change in my life
I don’t know what triggered it but I just could not take my mind off the skin condition after my engagement. I saw a couple of acne on my face and body which looked paler than my skin tone and I scheduled an appointment with a doctor. I took time off from work and went to the doctor, he assured me that I did not have the condition. But I wanted a second opinion, and I can’t thank the Universe enough for what happened after that.
I scheduled an appointment with this second doctor and she said the same thing that the other doctor had told me, I did not have the skin condition. But I hardly looked convinced.
The doctor asked me, “Are you getting anxious because of your impending marriage?”
“That could be a possibility,” I replied.
Since there’s so much pressure around looking good on your wedding day, I believe all my focus was on my appearance, or maybe the stress around wedding day preparations triggered this thought that was hiding somewhere in my mind..
Then she told me that no one exactly knows the causes of the condition, but it is believed to be an autoimmune condition where the body’s immune system attacks the healthy cells of the body by mistake. She told me it is not something to be scared of, the condition isn’t life-threatening or contagious. She, in fact, drew my attention to the weird-looking acne on my face which seemed to be spreading rapidly, and asked me to get treatment for those because they probably would affect me in a worse way than Vitiligo.
After speaking to her, my fear for Vitiligo started to weaken, I read a lot about it and discussed it with friends. I wanted to know if there were any support groups but my wedding date was getting closer so I started focusing on that, telling myself that I will write about it someday.
The day finally is here. It took me some time to calm the white noise inside my head, and I can only imagine how much strength, courage and determination it must take people who have the skin condition to brave it out in a society so obsessed with beauty as defined by their outdated standards.
The positive changes in general
A lot of positive change is happening towards people who have Vitiligo, and how the condition is now perceived in general. I’m not entirely sure why it took so long for these changes to occur, but I don’t want to complain because these changes are at least, happening.
Better sense is prevailing and most people now dismiss the legends associated with the skin condition and accept it as an auto-immune condition, not related to you consuming something. There is a lot of awareness about the skin condition and it is no more perceived to be contagious. There are many support groups that discuss the condition and things associated with it, like living with Vitiligo, dating someone who has Vitiligo, and any new developments in terms of treatments for the condition etc. I found this website while I was doing my research for this blog post and found it to be helpful.
Many companies are now choosing to engage models who have Vitiligo for their campaigns. Winnie Harlow is now a known name in the modelling world. There are many other models with Vitiligo who are breaking the societal standards of beauty and are making a name for themselves in the modeling world.
Remember
Someone’s skin color doesn’t define them, their determination to fight a disorder and the stigma associated with it does.
World Vitiligo Day is observed on June 25, please feel free to celebrate it in your own way. Let’s celebrate people who have the condition and let them know that they are one of us so that they never respond to anyone’s Instagram story that they feel inferior to others because their skin is different!
