I wonder if I would have been counted as keeping my name or “giving it up” in surveys. I added his name to mine, so I have two last names now (unhyphenated) but when we’re referred to together it’s easier to just use our one common name. And, my work email apparently didn’t have room for my name to show up with both last names. So, it some ways it still feels like I gave up my name because using both can be cumbersome.
Part of me wanted to just keep my name. I like it better than my husband’s name and I never had to spell it out. But, I liked the idea of sharing a name so my “ideal” solution was for both of us to hyphenate. The husband wasn’t on board with that, however, so until men change their mindset as well we won’t make quite as much progress. He’s progressive normally but is from a traditional background and I don’t think he knows anyone personally who kept their name.