Oh, no, you’re not crazy.
It’s almost impossible, if you have spent any time in traditional schooling, watching any form of media, or lived in our society to come out without unconscious biases and indoctrinated to uphold or rail against the system. In fact, it is practically impossible. Here are a few chosen ones for your purview.
When the school system indoctrinates us to learn a version of American history started with the white settlers & colonists, not that of the natives. These natives, made up of hundreds of unique tribes, have a rich heritage that is by and large ignored (and knowingly and systematically destroyed by the whites).
Two female Prime Ministers meet to discuss pressing matters on their nation’s policies regarding Brexit and the newspapers mentioned their legs, not their agenda.
People around the world lament foreign sounding call center workers, yet neglect to acknowledge their country’s part in colonialism and globalization, and their own greed for bargain basement prices and collusion for supporting slave & unfairly paid labor.
Our gay brothers are being rounded up to be killed in Chechnya and governments are speaking up with a deafening silence.
A message sent to all marginalized groups, regardless of field, country, or organisation by mostly white men: ‘you’re not good enough’ all while you are working twice as hard for half as much, and juggling the constant barrage of microaggressions.
Where migrants expect to be asked ‘where they are from?’ as a matter of course, even if they are natural born citizens, and feel the need to keep their passports close to hand to prove they are legal.
In a world ruled by banks, where the poorest who can barely hang on keep having services cut, funding cuts and rely on food banks, but corporations benefit from tax breaks or avoidance and in fact benefit from vast government subsides.
An innocent, unarmed boy is murdered by the police, and the media mentioned he was a black honor student, while a white male is mentioned as a swimmer before he is ever called a rapist by the same media.
As I said before, it is nearly impossible to have grown up in this society and not have faced this type of indoctrination. After your eyes have been opened, the next step is to decompress. Allow yourself to see the extent of the damage, the pervasiveness of your indoctrination and unfairness of the broken system. Allow yourself to feel the myriad of emotions that will rise within you. Begin to have the difficult conversations to share your truth in safe spaces and as you feel comfortable begin to speak in ever widening circles. By giving yourself space, you create more space for others to heal and speak. There is a great shame in these wounds, yours possibly, but definitely within wounds of the collective. Speaking about it brings fresh air, instead of more festering.
Silence breeds shame and begets more silence.
It is essential that you find reassurance that you are not crazy, your response is a natural reaction to an unfair situation. I’m here to reassure you, that you are not crazy. You are in fact as well adjusted as you can possibly be under the circumstances.
It’s like walking through a one-way door, you’ll never be the same. You won’t ever heal to the place before your indoctrination and programming. That is impossible — to unsee the seen. However, you’ll be able to heal the pain, as well as stand in your power, stand in your truth, stand in the world in a new way.