My Amazing Journey:

10. The distortion

The mirage is not an oasis. The hallucination is not a reality. I’ve chosen to thrive in the desert of my own created world which doesn’t exist. I’m just like a hacked, dried and perched desert-walker who’s creates out of his disillusioned mind his imagination about an oasis and sees the mirage which has no existence at all. Every hallucination is a product of a fictional imagination. Nobody else created it except for the one who sees it. God didn’t create any magical surprise. It is I who always look for such extra-ordinary awe, all of which are illusions. I know it but still pay every price I can to experience those magical shows. Later, I too intend to play such magic-shows before my folks and create a similar awe in them.

Everything that I see out there is actually not there and I’m not ready to see what is really there. I see the mirage through my own distorted perception but I’m not yet awakened to see the oasis. I’m like an actor who is in awe to prove, show and feel as if I were the real hero or any other special character of the story. I wish to retain that pride even beyond that story among my fellow men as long as I can. If and when I seem to lose that fictitious image of mine I become upset, alarmed and even terrified. The fact is I’m not that hero beyond the story. I’m just moving out there with my distorted, illusory and erroneous perception. The kicks of my public applause, honor, prestige and wealth like hallucination eventually sustains my existence in my own created world.

I’ve no idea of the miraculous reality about me. In fact, I was created in this body not to constantly seek that temporal hallucination of pleasure, prosperity and wealth and consequently regret the flip-side sufferings, miseries, pains, fear and struggles. I was rather created to experience the miracle of the heavens here in this body. Alas! I fell into deep sleep before being able to fathom the reality.