The Pain of Being in a Relationship: When Love Becomes a Transaction
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My Parents Spent More Than $30,000 on Raising Me. Is It Unreasonable for Me to Expect a Generous Dowry? The Man’s Heartfelt Response
Yang Yang has been dating her boyfriend for 2 years. They met at a friend’s gathering and instantly fell in love. Due to age considerations, they planned to get married in the second year of their relationship. However, a major conflict arose before the wedding regarding the dowry.
As Yang Yang’s parents have only one daughter, they have high expectations for the dowry. Following their customs, they requested $30,000 as they wanted their daughter to have a grand wedding.
However, Yang Yang’s boyfriend was dissatisfied with this request. He felt that Yang Yang’s parents were deliberately making things difficult for him. Feeling aggrieved, Yang Yang said, “My parents spent more than $30,000 on raising me. Is it unreasonable for me to expect a generous dowry?”
Upon hearing this, the boyfriend became angry and bluntly told Yang Yang, “With that $30,000, I could buy a car. Even if I had it, I wouldn’t give it to you. You decide if you want this marriage. You can go with your parents.”
After hearing this, Yang Yang was speechless. Due to the dowry issue, their relationship came to an end. Even in the end, Yang Yang’s pleading for the boyfriend not to leave was futile.
Listening to their story, perhaps everyone can relate to some extent. But in reality, this story serves as a wake-up call for women.
Love Yourself
Someone who loves you will accommodate you, fearing they haven’t given you enough. Someone who doesn’t love you will try to change you, fearing your demands are too much. So, love yourself well to avoid getting hurt in love.
They say men change before and after marriage, and the same goes for some women.
Lin Huiyin said, “If you truly like someone, they will always be in your heart.”
Many women, after marriage, place all their expectations on one man. However, this approach only leads to self-inflicted wounds. The only person we can truly rely on in this world is ourselves. When you place your hopes on others, you will stagnate and become increasingly insignificant in relationships.
If you want to be loved, you must learn to love yourself. Only when you truly understand the meaning of love will your life improve. Love is not about depletion but mutual growth. When you love yourself, more people will love you.
Love Deserves the Right Person
Chen Guo said, “The one who makes you smile deserves your lifetime.”
What kind of love is meaningful? Everyone may have a different answer to this question, but I believe love should be reserved for the deserving. Few people genuinely treat you well in this world, and those who truly love you won’t make excuses.
The person who loves you may not be wealthy but will be willing to give their all for you. They may not be free but will always make time for you.
Real love is not just talk; you must give your love to those who deserve it. Only then will you not be drained by love.
Life has its ups and downs, which is why we must spend our limited time loving those who deserve it.
In life, we may encounter various people, but not everyone is worth our love. Learn to invest your time in those who deserve it, and you will experience more happiness and joy.
Begging Won’t Bring Love
This was the tenth time her boyfriend blocked her. She cried all night over this, and friends advised her to give up. But she kept saying, “He loves me.”
In relationships, many have begged humbly, but what does humility bring? Everyone may have their own answer to this question.
But humility won’t bring back love. Begging in a relationship will only cheapen yourself.
Seeing those chat logs and lengthy discussions is like seeing your past humility and flattery.
Eileen Chang once said, “No matter who leaves you, don’t forget that you were living your life before they came.”
In relationships, begging humbly won’t change anything. It will only bring you more grievances and sadness. If someone truly loves you, they wouldn’t want to see you hurt or humiliated.
Effort may yield results in life, but not in love. True love requires mutual effort; one person’s humility will only lead to more pain.
Every girl wants to find her own true love, but not every relationship will have a perfect ending. Conflicts arise due to various desires in life, and those who can leave you do so because their love isn’t deep enough.
While material wealth shouldn’t measure relationships, a man’s attitude towards you can be seen through material things. If a man values material possessions more than you, he isn’t worth your trust. If you encounter such a man, it’s best to leave early, as true love should be reserved for those who deserve it.
