Hm. Where to start.

For one, I don’t separate my experience as a trans person from misogyny. My dysphoria is not driven by misogyny, but it still reacts to it, because misogyny is also firmly rooted in cissexism, the assumption that people’s gender and therefore place in life is defined entirely by their genitals. Misogyny to me becomes a big ball of “You were born this way, therefore you think this way and want these things and are this and nothing else.” I saw someone label this pretty well recently, as misgendered misogyny. All the fun of misogyny with the extra edge of misgendering.

I don’t really understand how you can “need” to feel anything. Feelings are a reaction to circumstance, not what’s necessary.

I became even worse off because I felt I had lost the political ties to womanhood that had given me the language to talk about misogyny.

This makes me angry. To be clear I’m not angry at you, I’m angry at the way the world segregates everything so strongly by sex to the point that some people are deeply invested in policing other people’s experiences. Trans men (and people who think they are trans men) should not have to isolate themselves or stop talking about misogyny. There should be room in feminism for trans people of both genders to talk about misogyny without the feeling that we’re somehow competing with each other and a strong consensus that recognizing trans men experience misogyny doesn’t mean that trans women don’t. But most of the shit I’ve heard from the online trans community has been bashing transmasculine people for being allowed to even exist in female spaces, no matter if they’re pre-physical transition or even pre-realization. It’s one of the things I have been and will continue to be loudest about in the trans community because it drives me up the fucking wall.

Finally, nothing you’ve described here is foreign to me in any way. I still don’t understand what about your circumstances means you require completely different treatment from me, but I don’t have to. If you’re safe and happy I’m not going to quibble about your choice.