Being like everyone else
Finally I’ve come up to a very interesting and deep thought that I feel like it has to be shared. Consider that I have NO experience on writing and publishing, so this is my first time. I didn’t sit down to think what to write, it just popped up in my mind while I did other things. I’m sorry if some ideas aren’t very clear, but English is not my first language. I’ll try and do my best!
So… Today I thought about myself and realized I’ve been making a very big mistake. I always thought, from the times I was just a little girl, that I was special, different and wonderful. I always felt like I was destined for something great, like being a famous writer, or an astronaut, or a paleontologist, or any job that sounds really cool. I thought I was born to be remembered, to be the best. And as I grew older, I started to force myself to find a way to be that special and unique person, I forced myself to discard those options that didn’t include being awesome and happy. I mean, for example, that I couldn’t allow myself not to make someone’s life better if I became a psychologist. Or, if I became a writer, I HAD to write a bestseller, or at least a mind-blowing story that changed somebody’s way of thinking. Or, if I became a journalist, I HAD to be very famous and admired. And that same reasoning applies to every job or career I could choose. Maybe I was open to the idea of not being as important as Albert Einstein, but being like everybody else? Being a common person? NO CHANCE. But I also tried to be different in every little detail I could, not just big things like my career and family, also in things like sexuality (I used my bisexuality as an aspect that made me different, and therefore, better) or how much open-minded I was, or how much things I learned at school. I believed that all those differences made me BETTER than the rest of the world (normal people). I thought being normal was the same as being inferior. I NEVER allowed myself to be just good, I HAD to be the best, I NEVER thought that being like almost everybody was OK. Until today.
The truth is that not everyone can be the best, not everyone can be special, or famous, or remembered. Some of us are made to be simpler: To study something we like (or not), to have a job related to what you study and like (or not) and to live our lives quietly like everybody else, maybe marrying someone and having some children, or just living for yourself. Actually, most of us are made to be just that simple. And that is TOTALLY FINE. It’s NOT MANDATORY to find happiness on money, or professional achievement, or love. It’s ok to fail sometimes, to change plans in life, to never leave your country or never be rich, or never finding “true love”. And that is something that some of us forget while chasing success: That we may not achieve our final and perfect goal but that doesn’t mean we can’t be happy or that we are a deception or failure. Everyone of us is special in some way, but it doesn’t mean we’re all the best, because that is impossible. I don’t know if anybody has ever felt like this, like there’s a pressure created by you that isn’t allowing you to make mistakes, but if you feel it, then LET IT GO, you’ll realize that the world is still spinning and that it wasn’t so necessary for you to be special. It was just you, giving yourself a headache. Now, I’m not saying we shouldn’t ought to be great and special, I’m just saying that we shouldn’t let that be our ONLY option in life, we HAVE to be open to failure, or to smaller accomplishments. Because, if you fail, what will happen with you? Will you just give up, or cry all your life for it? No, you stand up and learn from your mistakes so you can do better next time.
I believe life is full of second chances, it’s just that I wasn’t planning on using any other chance. Now I see that if I’m so closed to other ways, so closed to failure, I’m making myself miserable now AND in the future, because of the stress, the pressure, and the difficulties life will give me. So my advice to whoever reads this is: Allow yourself to be like everybody else, don’t try to be different by all means, even when there are lots of people expecting that from you. Because whatever you decide to be in life will be ok as long as you accept it.
Maybe I’m too young and this advice seems quite obvious for you, or maybe it helps you out a little. I hope I can inspire someone with these words, but if I don’t, I’m not going to die because of it. (See? I’m open to failure hahaha).