Why you shouldn’t date me…

I have been thinking about why someone shouldn’t date me. I first posed this question to a good friend to write about himself; who always seems to be in these ridiculous love affairs that go nowhere. He put it on the back burner… Men. Such priviledge.

Here’s what I consider my greatest problems in dating me… My top 5 with explanations:

1. I am truthful. I do not lie to men, my friends or strangers. (When I was very young, I used to be a total liar. I am 54) This is not to be confused with holding some mystery about myself. No, I am not going to sit across from you at dinner and treat you like a free therapy session… Nor will I cry in my beer about “the one that got away” Nah. If you ask me a question I will answer in my truth. If I am seeing someone else I will say so. If I can’t see you, I will say so. If I take issue with some bullshit you said, I will offer my rebuttal. If you ask me a question, I may answer. If I asnwer it will be the truth.
2. I live a romantic life. I love cut flowers and fine table linens. I am obsessed with fine bed linens. I’ll send you notes… Handwritten. I’ll invite you over for decadent home cooked meals with equally decadent desserts. All paired with great wines. I’ll treat you like I treat my friends. You will not have to wonder about my attention, intentions or affection.
3. I am a book junkie. I read lots of books and I want to talk about them. I have several library cards from around the country. Libraries are sacred pleasures. If you don’t like books and libraries you will not like me. Show me your library and I show you mine. (Foreplay for the bibliophiles)
4. I value alone time. Time without you. Often.
5. I am busy. But only to those who don’t understand empire building. It may seem like I don’t have time for a lover… Not true. Harmony is a must. Shared destiny, shared dreams, shared desires. I can make time and room for someone who’ll make time and room for me.

These five things have been the reasons why dates and potential love interests have petered out. I have come to realize that these things aren’t arduous… They just don’t resonate with the men I’ve been trying on. They aren’t bad men… Just men not meant for me.

So here is where I start again… Don’t date me 1–5. How about you? Why shouldn’t people date you?

I deserve a lover who believes this!