Unemployment Journal — Day 7–8
Howling at the Moon
I’ve had a couple of bad good days, or good bad days, or something like that. Let’s look at the ledger:
- Drank too much Monday night (three beers, and it was a social thing, but that was enough to throw me off)
- After my morning walk Tuesday, didn’t do much of anything for the rest of the day. I managed to pull things together enough towards the end to cook dinner, but that’s about it.
- I’m not getting the job in Portland, OR I wanted. “The post has been put on hold indefinitely” whatever that means. Sigh.
- Booked my lodgings for next month’s trip to Alameda. I was really worried about finding something affordable, so I’ve been avoiding this. The hotel I wanted had room, but the rates were outrageous (almost $400 PER NIGHT) and I didn’t have enough hotel points to cover it. However, I managed to find an Airbnb that will run about $800 for the five nights we need. The host just confirmed and accepted. Score!
- I had a good phone interview yesterday with a company in southwest Florida. I got a call today that they are bringing me down for in-person interviews. I need to get my suit pressed and stock up on sunscreen.
- On yesterday’s walk I took my camera. What do you think?
I’ve been stressed about the lodgings in California for some time. I tried to find an affordable place a couple of months ago and I didn’t like the options, so I basically gave up. As the trip came closer and closer my anxiety rose, until finally I was obsessing about it while trying desperately to ignore it. Not good.
The resulting anxiety surfaced in a low-productivity procrastination, where I couldn’t do the thing I was worried about or much of anything else more than drinking, eating, watching TV, and playing computer games, sometimes all at once. Not only could I not book the rooms, I couldn’t do anything else useful. Stuff was stacking up.
Last night I told myself I wasn’t going to bed until I had it worked out. First, I found an acceptable backup hotel — one kind of far away, but not too far, and affordable. It was a chain hotel about a half hour drive from my brother’s house. Not ideal, but hardly bankrupting either. Calmed me down a bit. Then I found a place a little closer, a little cheaper, not quite as nice, but takes reservations with no cancellation penalty. I booked the rooms and kept looking. Then the Airbnb rental fell into my lap. Two bedrooms, half what the hotel would have cost, and on the water. Whew.
With that out of the way, I can relax. Or, more accurately, WORK.
This has been a real routine killer. I need a better handle on it. I need to recognize when I stall like this, figure out what’s really bothering me, and take baby steps to deal with it until the problem is managed. I can feel time slipping away. It looks like (with a little luck) I’m going to get a new job sooner rather than later, so I’d better use this time well while I have it.