To be triggered, you’d literally have to be a firearm or some other sort of device with a trigger mechanism.
To be able to get a pitchfork and torch-wielding mob together and go after people for saying things that make us feel uncomfortable, we would have to be literal medieval peasants (who has pitchforks and torches laying around, anyway? Eew, gross!)
To be able to grasp metaphors, we’d literally have to be ancient Hellenes (don’t call them Greeks, bigot!)
And, like, everyone knows witches aren’t real: the only magic that’s real are the magically oppressive trifecta of sexism, racism and trans/homo/pedophobia.
Anyway, where were we? Oh, right-get me, lynch me!
On a completely unrelated topic, do you own any cats? How many?