57 Beer Tokens — Spanish Lions and the Una Cerveza Theory

Every article needs a strong opening Lion to get the readers attention. I’ve peaked here. But back to this later…

Records are made to be broken. My personal record was a 36 day drinking binge for the World Cup in Germany when I was 19. For that I paid the price of 6 months without a proper shit. For any of you out there who know the pain of not being able to use the toilet for a pro-longed period you will know it’s diabolical. I’m not religious, but I was praying to Poo Jesus everyday for one clean snap.

‘Poo Jesus’ - Sometimes you’ve just got to sit back and applaud Dr Google’s genius.

Irrelevant anecdote over, because I didn’t break my record. I just drank the most in a month for this year in 14/30 days. Go me!

So without further a June:

  • The Single Beer Beer Token Night:

A common comment people make when I explain the beer token rules to them is “ I bet you really make it count when you use one”. I think I’ve matured enough now through the year to know that I can actually take it easy on a token night. My first night in Barcelona I had one single solitary beer while eating some of the best tapas I’ve ever had. BUT! Eating Tapas alone is like dancing with a mop at home in your undies while singing the Grease theme tune. It might be awesome and Sandy is def’ looking hot, but you don’t want anyone to catch you doing it.

Get away from Sandy
  • The Aftermath of a Single Beer BeerToken Night:

A common comment people make when I explain the beer token rules to them is “ I bet you really make it count when you use one”. And like fuck I’ve matured. After a single beer beer token you fucking GET AFTER IT! So much so that I let my anger at having to do work on my first few days of holidays get to me and I dialled in Willington (my drunk alter-ego). He got lairy and nobody knows what he did. But I woke up on my back on a beach bench at 8AM in the blazing Spanish sunshine. To my surprise there was an old Spanish lady placing my coins back on my chest as they’d fallen out of my pocket. There’s good people out there, especially old Spanish ones.

  • The Middle Ground Token — Riding Lions with Babes:

There’s no common comment here but there is a lesson to be learnt — Drink in moderation kids. Without moderation the image at the top of my post wouldn’t be possible. It allowed me to have a great night cutting around Barcelona bars and hanging out with a bunch of cool people. Culminating in the ability to climb a lion and ride off into the sunrise with a Brazilian babe. Now that’s how you token!

  • Wedding Tokens are worth it:

One of my best buddies got married in Canada mid-month and I was faced with a dilemma… Do I drink everyday in the lead-up to the wedding? Now, because I’d been so good during the year I was able to say heck yes ey! I drank fine wine, the most delicious whisky and everything else in between without feeling guilty. For those playing next year. It’s good to plan these things out early as I knew this was was on the card since 2015. BTW- if you want to join the crew email ben.activations@gmail.com :)

  • Niall Rodgers = Legend:

Nothing to do with tokens except me and my buddy B-Rup went to see him and I gladly used a token. I had no idea how impressive his music career had been and I guarantee you’ve had sex to several of his songs.

Freak Out!

Token Days Off — Drink Less, Live More

(The things you do instead of drinking are ALMOST the most important things you learn)

Give yourself a deadline: I’ve been writing my script (like everyone in the world) since I was 23. I gave myself a deadline of when I was going to get the next version to my mates in TV. This pressured me into staying home more as I didn’t want to let them down. Make sure the deadline includes someone else as you can always talk yourself out of things.

Bike Challenge:

This was the challenge I was going to win - “Don’t ride a bike for a month”. I’d broken my bike and it was all good to go and too easy. Until I instigated a morning token post beach pass-out session. I was invited by some crew to go on a bike tour of Barcelona. I drank drove too, beer biking isn’t advisable but so refreshing. So add £120x 9= £1080 dickhead!

I have a feeling this is just to get chicks and there’s just apple juice inside. None the less — strong.

SINGLE USE PLASTIC CHALLENGE

I’m not going to be able to do this one. I eat too much chewy, but I’m thinking I can find other uses for plastics. I think 99.9% of us are single use plastic spastics. I’m def one of them.

June Stats: 1 failed challenge (1x instance), 14 Drinking Sessions. 13/14 tokens worth it (Record). £656 spent in total (Holy shit!)

For my Previous Month’s Escapades:

THE BEGINNING

JAN

FEB

MAR

APR

May

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