I really appreciate you giving several sides here -mentioning both the things you enjoy and the things that put you off!
In my opinion, you are right, Germany is so different from the States, for example. But sometimes, it might be too easy to mistake some things like bureaucratic issues that actually give you a sense of security for sternness, for example.
It is a shame, tho, that you are target of racial discrimination (as it is a shame that you won’t get an apartment due to you not being German and this obvious discrimination both saddens me and fills me with disappointment and anger) and we should do everything in our power to fight this and to end discrimination in whatever way og might exist, but I do not agree on an alleged rise of xenophobia. It is true that certain parties raise a sense of hostility, especially against refugees, and make use of peoples feelings of insecurity in order to promote their own sick, disgusting, racist and xenophobic programs -but they are and will stay a minority, they just get a lot of press, media attention and should of course not be underestimated. But from my experience, on one of those who fall victim to their rethoric (and literal) politics and acts of hate come ten others who just spend the fourth night in a row balancing work and volunteering at a refugee shelter or the like.
So yeah, racism might still be an embarrassingly big problem. And yeah, there is a rise in awareness of xenophobic attacks, but that might not exactly equal a rise of xenophobia.