My great ambition.
Born in Kabul, Afghanistan, in the early 1990s, Anahita* is the second oldest of six children. Her ‘great ambition’? To study, to work and to have a job. So she became a midwife.
“In Afghanistan, women need a lot of help and a lot of support. One day my aunty said if you want to help — you should be a midwife. You can help and support women in Afghanistan and everywhere you want to go in the world.”
According to a report by Save the Children, Afghanistan is one of the worst places in the world to be a mother. A woman dies every two hours as a result of pregnancy-related causes, and Afghanistan has the highest proportion of women who die in childbirth of any country in the world.
The vast majority of women in rural areas birth with no skilled help besides a daya (traditional birth attendant), partly due to the paucity of health centres and midwives, partly because of the harsh terrain and remoteness of certain villages, and partly because of customary traditions to do with women being confined to their homes.
However, unlike in rural provinces, more and more women in the capital are choosing to birth in hospitals — meaning the demand for midwifery skills is growing rapidly. It is common for doctors to be present only for caesarean births or in certain high-risk cases. Other than that, midwives take care of the mother.
After studying midwifery for several years at a private institute in Kabul, Anahita began work as a midwife in one of the city’s hospitals where she assisted births regularly.
In 2015, she met Rahim* who had migrated to Australia in 2010 but had returned home to Afghanistan for a period of time to reconnect with friends and family. Before long, they were married.
Anahita remembers saying to Rahim before she accepted his marriage proposal: “I want to study, I want to work, do you like?’ and he said ‘yes of course!’ So I agreed to marry him!”
It’s hard to find a more beautiful and perfectly suited couple, from their ideas on lifelong education to their matching photoshoot outfits!
They arrived in Australia together in 2016 and not long afterwards, Anahita fell pregnant and found her way to Birth for HumanKIND’s Mothering 101 education and peer support program for young mums. Trixie, the program’s coordinator, said Anahita was “always early and very keen”. She even taught a component of a session on checking the positioning of the baby and was such a valuable resource for other young mums in the group.
“Even though I was a midwife, I still learn lots of things [in Mothering 101] like about epidurals because in Afghanistan we don’t use these things during labour.”
How did she feel when her waters broke in the early hours of February 16?
Relieved.
At her last prenatal appointment she recalls the doctor saying that if she didn’t have her baby in the next few days she should be induced.
“At that time, I became worried. One of my patients’ baby in Afghanistan died during induction because the midwife was inexperienced. Because of that, when my water broke I become happy,” she says as she smiles and sighs with relief.
It is this type of history of trauma and fear that accompanies many of the women we work with into the birth suite.
After 14 hours of labouring, Anahita’s baby girl was born with her husband, sister-in-law, and Birth for HumanKIND’s volunteer doula, Phoebe, by her side.
How would it have been different if she gave birth in Afghanistan?
“I worked in a private hospital — we didn’t use painkillers because it is not common. The women want to have a natural delivery. All of the women in Afghanistan are strong, they can. But they have a lot of babies: ten, eight, six babies. And many still have their babies at home without any experienced doctor or midwife just a daya (traditional birth attendant). My mother-in-law had six children, all at home. My mother also had six children, five at home and one in hospital in Iran (where her family lived during the Taliban regime).”
And, how was it having a Birth for HumanKIND doula support her and her partner?
“She supported me physically during the labour, but I can’t remember my labour much. I know I held Phoebe’s hands and she said ‘well done Anahita, you can, you are strong’ and it helped me. She massaged my back, my shoulders. She is like my family member. After this, I don’t forget her, her help, her support and I want to be in contact with her after this.”
[Having a doula] is so useful — for me, and for other women, this is the time that we need all the support, partner support, friends, so good for a mum — especially for the first baby. If it was by money or cost, I can’t have. If it’s free, then I can.”
Given what we know about the positive impacts of having a doula’s support throughout pregnancy, birth and early parenting — access to these services should not just be an option for women who can afford it, but a service available to all women. We truly believe that every woman deserves access to the support she needs as she brings her baby into the world and it is a privilege to provide this support through our doula support program.
“It was an absolute honour to be with her through her pregnancy and birth. Both Anahita and Rahim are incredibly welcoming and grateful people — it was a privilege to be invited into their home where I learnt about their culture and family. She was able to teach me so much about midwifery and birth in Afghanistan, being a midwife herself, so it was a wonderful experience of sharing and learning for all of us, as it always should be. There is so much love in their new family it brings a smile to my face just thinking about it!” — Phoebe, Birth for HumanKIND volunteer doula
What is Anahita’s ‘great ambition’ now?
“Maybe I will become a doula with Birth for HumanKIND in the future because I want to help all of the women that I can help — but also for Afghan women — I can translate and support them. Every time [that] I had an appointment at the Royal Women’s Hospital — I think ‘I hope one day I work here’! If I speak, then I can advise other mums — especially if they are having [their] first baby — you should have a doula! I wish they have a doula like Phoebe. It’s so good because the family may become worried, like a partner, a sister, a mother — and a doula is a strong person and her support is useful and helpful.”
This is the fifth in a 12-part series to celebrate World Doula Week. Donate here to Birth for HumanKIND’s fundraising campaign and put the kindness back into birth culture. For more information on the services we provide and who we support, please visit: www.birthforhumankind.org
*names have been changed to honour their privacy
