Review of LEAN IN by Sheryl Sandberg
When I first read LEAN IN on the 23rd of March 2018, after a few (almost at page 100) pages, I put the book down and wept. I wept my sanity back (don't mind me, I'm a cry baby). . It was as though Sheryl had met me or had been told about me. The words stung. As someone who has done a lot of lean in, shrinking, bending back, front and sideways, it was a wake up call. I read LEAN IN thrice in eleven days. It was profound and brought forth many emotions from me. A very real book I must say coming from one of the most powerful women in the world that shows that our struggles as women are not different irrespective of where we live and how far we rise. We are constantly looking back and judging ourselves and our Successes by how the society feels we should behave, earn, aspire or make time for family when men are not held to such standards. It also shows that we shrink (most times unintentionally) in the presence of males (allies, mentors, foes, narratives etc). Lean in is a book I hope every girl and woman gets to read in her lifetime.
I learnt a lot and I doubt that I will have enough space to pen down my thoughts but I'll try.
1. Embrace Uncertainty
2. When it comes to making decisions that most effect our world, women's voices are not heard equally.
3. The promise of equality is not the same as true equality
4. Conditions for all women will improve when there are more women in leadership roles giving strong and powerful voice to our needs and concerns.
5. Female accomplishments come at a cost
6. From a very young age, boys are encouraged to take charge and offer their opinions
7. The gender stereotypes introduced in childhood are reinforced throughout our lives and become self-fulfilling prophecies
8. Women are not thinking about having it all, they are worried about losing it all
9. Women can have both families and careers, they can thrive while doing so.
10. SIT AT THE TABLE
11. Don't feel like a fraud in the face of your accomplishment or recognition. Don't underestimate yourself
12. LEARN TO KEEP YOUR HAND UP
13. as a woman, you must learn to negotiate more. (time, salaries, options etc)
14. You can't please everybody.
15. CAREERS ARE A JUNGLE GYM, NOT A LADDER
16. Women need to be more open to taking risks in their careers
17. Do not wait for power to be offered, like that tiara, it might never materialise.
18. Anything that evens out the opportunities for men and women is the right practice
19. As a woman, you might not be listening to women and their concerns enough (might be unintentionally too)
20. Peers can mentor and sponsor one another
21.. The ability to listen is as important as the ability to speak
22. DON'T LEAVE BEFORE YOU LEAVE - Of all the ways women hold themselves back, perhaps the most pervasive is that they leave before they leave.
23. No one should pass judgement on highly personal decisions
24. DON'T LEAN IN regardless of circumstances
25. As women must be empowered at work, men must be more empowered against home.
26. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner
27. Make your partner a real partner
28. Let's talk about it - the gender bias, the discrimination in pay, flexibility etc at home and in our workplaces
29. Think personally, act communally
30. Let's work together towards gender equality.
Sheryl goes in depth to explain to say what Shirley has always said "We must reject not only the stereotypes that others hold of us but also the stereotypes that we hold of ourselves”.