Happy Honeyed Hair
Honey! It’s awesome.
Honey’s been around since the creation of Earth. Or at least, whenever God created bees. All my life I’ve used honey — for tea, and peanut butter-honey sandwiches. But I never knew to use it on my hair.
For years, most of us in the United States have been born into an unfortunate ignorance about hair care — heck, about body care in general. The common misunderstanding is that you need shampoo; you need conditioner. Then there’s the subset that goes beyond shampoo and conditioner with mousse, hairspray, leave-in conditioners, relaxers, perms, hair dyes, etc. And folks, none of that stuff needs FDA approval before hitting shelves. Seriously! Hair products, body soaps, lotions — no approval. Nada.
Personally I believe there’s a high probability that all of these “hygiene” and “beauty” products contribute to many of the cancers our species suffers. But I’m not a doctor; nor am I scientist. I hope there are doctors and scientists out there exploring the possible connection between cancers and unregulated body products.
But this post isn’t about all that depressing stuff. It’s about honey!
All my life, I’ve had dry, frizzy ends and an oily scalp. I have never been satisfied or comfortable in my hair. It always felt like I was wearing a wig, or a nest of tarantulas defiantly sticking their legs out everywhere and causing my scalp to itch and the edges of my face to break out in acne. Entering young adulthood I started cutting my hair shorter and shorter, until eventually I was doing buzz cuts. My hair grows back fast so I wasn’t worried, and it turned out that my particular face looks really good with short hair.
But I’m a fan of Lord of the Rings. I read all the ASoIaF books, and I watch GoT. Love Vikings, too. And all the women in that medieval/fantasy genre have long, gorgeous hair! And I wanted that! Even at a younger age I’d wanted long hair — but I hadn’t wanted all the exasperating care that went with it. Wearing it down, it was equal parts oily and frizzy. Wearing it up, it would always slide rebelliously out of whatever ‘do I had it in. So I gave up on it.
My last time cutting my hair was last year, right before I realized I was pregnant with my son — so late May, early June. My hair just kept getting oilier and frizzier. In fact that’s a thing — hair becoming unmanageable during pregnancy. At the time we lived in greater Dayton, Ohio — a river basin. FYI: river basins mean lots of allergens and dust floating in the air. Glory. So every time I combed out my hair, my comb would come away with strands of oily, frizzy hair — and dust. Thick chunks of dust wedged between the comb’s teeth. Faugh! So gross and frustrating. So I lopped it off. Buzzed it off, actually!
I’m glad I did that — it was a huge relief not to have to worry about my hair on top of morning sickness, baby prep, doctor’s visits, weight gain, etc. Even after having my son it was a joy not to have my gross hair throwing a tantrum every time I looked in the mirror.
But as I began adjusting to life with our firstborn, I started missing my hair. My husband and I were talking about moving back to the east coast to be closer to family — which meant we wouldn’t be swimming in allergens and dust anymore — and I started thinking: There has to be a way I can make long hair work for me.
It’s just a matter of figuring out what that way is.
I already knew that shampoos and conditioners are damaging to hair. Because of the lack of regulations and the plethora of chemicals and harsh cleaning agents in shampoos and conditioners, shampoo and conditioner dries your hair out. Your hair then compensates for that dryness by overproducing oil; hence the oily roots and frizzy ends.
I knew that if I wanted long hair to work for me, I needed to give up commercial shampoos and conditioners. I needed to go natural. So I went to Whole Foods and purchased Jason Super Shine Apricot shampoo and conditioner — a mostly natural alternative to mainstream hair care products. But I did more than that: I made a commitment not to use extra products on my hair like mousse, gels, hair sprays, pomades, perms, relaxers, etc. — which was hard, because my hair was just starting the growing-out stage and looked awkward. I also stopped using curling irons and straightening irons. A few times I was tempted to dye my hair, but that would have been counterintuitive — hair dyes are some of the most hair-damaging chemicals out there! Besides, my husband likes the natural color of my hair. So no hair dyes.
I should note that several years back, before I was married, I went straight from using shampoo and conditioner to trying this DIY no-poo with coconut milk. It works for a lot of people, but it just didn’t work for me. I stuck with it for two and a half months — my hair just kept getting oilier and oilier! So I gave it up. Looking back, I think that part of the reason it didn’t work was because I didn’t transition slowly: Instead of moving from mainstream shampoo and conditioner to all-natural shampoo and conditioner, and then going no-poo, I went “cold turkey”, so to speak. I also hadn’t given up using a hair straightener, and at the time my hair was partially dyed. So I was working against myself.
This time, I used Jason Super Shine Apricot shampoo and conditioner for several months. Once a week I deep-conditioned my hair. I mixed 1 teaspoon coconut oil, 1 teaspoon safflower oil and 1 teaspoon vitamin E oil, warmed it lightly in the microwave and applied it to damp hair, massaging it in at the roots and working it out to the ends before letting it sit under wraps for about an hour. Then I would shampoo and condition my hair as usual. I made sure only to shampoo and condition three times a week, as washing your hair every day is also damaging.
Doing this my hair has been growing out from its buzz cut with a healthy shine and no frizz. But I still felt like my roots were producing too much oil — after just one day my hair would get stringy and look like it needed cleaning again! So finally, last week, I decided it was time to try going no-poo.
I certainly didn’t want to brave that coconut milk no-poo a second time. I also certainly didn’t want to use that oh-so-popular baking soda no-poo. Baking soda is a good no-poo route once in a blue moon, IF your hair is full of, say, mud, peanut butter, leave-in conditioner, pomade or gel, or is just really gunky and dirty. But for regular use, baking soda’s pH is too high; thus it is too harsh on your hair and scalp. So I got online and started Googling DIY no-poos, and quickly found the blog Empowered Sustenance — with a post for raw honey no-poo! Clicking on it, I found a recipe even simpler and quicker to make than the coconut milk no-poo had been. Your scalp’s preferred pH range is 4–7, and honey’s pH is a 4, meaning it’s gentle on your scalp and hair. You can take a gander at the recipe for yourself here.
I sat staring at Lauren’s honey no-poo recipe, warring internally with all the doubts that plagued my mind. Mostly it was my memory, replaying the time-consuming effort I had endured prepping and storing that coconut milk no-poo, and the ensuing disappointment when, day after day and week after week I emerged from the shower with hair more limp, itchy and oily than before — not to mention acne popping up all over my face as a result. Would honey do the same thing? Would I be wasting my time, effort and money? After all you can’t just use any honey — it has to be raw honey. That’s because raw honey contains the enzymes, vitamins and nutrients that benefit your hair and help your scalp to regain its natural pH balance (thus eliminiting dryness and normalizing oil production). Pasteurized honey (any bottle of honey that doesn’t specifically say “Raw”) is stripped of those enzymes, vitamins and nutrients. And raw honey is expensive.
In the end I went for it (obviously, or this blog post wouldn’t exist). I love honey, so I figured even if honey no-poo didn’t work for me I could use it in my tea. I went to Weis and picked up Heavenly Organics 100% Organic Raw Neem Honey, and some raw apple cider vinegar with the “mother”. (Apple cider vinegar is a natural replacement for conditioner.) It doesn’t matter where the honey comes from (what the bees who made your honey harvested on) as long as the bottle says ‘Raw’.
As Lauren’s blog instructed, I lightly heated 3 tablespoons of filtered water, added 1 tablespoon of raw neem honey and stirred until the solution was well mixed. In a separate cup I warmed 1 cup of filtered water and added 1 tablespoon of apple cider vinegar. In the shower I used the honey water no-poo just as you would use shampoo; I rinsed my hair and then poured the honey water on, massaging it into my roots (make sure not to scratch, which damages roots; use the balls of your fingertips!) and then working it out to the ends. I let the honey water sit in my hair for about five minutes while I soaped my body down; then I rinsed it out and poured the apple cider vinegar rinse over my hair. I gently worked this in as well, let it sit a couple minutes and then rinsed again.
Tip: I always use lukewarm water when washing, conditioning and rinsing my hair. That’s because hot water damages your hair and cold water causes your pores to close up, meaning your roots and scalp can’t absorb the nutritional benefits of honey and apple cider vinegar fully. Lukewarm is a good place to be!
When I first stepped out of the shower, I mentally gave a tired sigh: My hair felt thick, heavy and weighed down. My strands gathered together in clumps and felt dense; coarse; hard to separate. I thought: Here we go again. It seemed this would be another failed attempt: a Too-Good-To-Be-True-No-Poo.
Fast forward to the next morning.
I woke up.
I frowned, confused: I couldn’t even feel my hair. My scalp felt light; comfortable.
I raised my fingers to my head and breathed a sigh of relief — my hair was still there.
And yet, not the same hair.
Soft. Smooth. Clean. Light. Comfortable. My hair parted effortlessly as I ran my fingers through it; none of the strands clung together. My scalp felt fresh with a slight, feel-good tingle.
I could feel that the roots were more oily than the rest of my hair, but not nearly as oily as they had been the last 26 years of my life.
Wow.
I went through my day blissfully confused. I could feel the warmth of my hair, but I couldn’t feel my hair in the usual way: the itching, prickling, sticking-out, snarled, frizzy, oily feeling I usually had, like every few minutes some teeny tiny bug was crawling over my scalp. That awful feeling was gone.
The next day my confusion increased: My hair still looked good. It was still light and soft and clean and shiny and obedient, each strand lying gently against each strand neatly around my head. I ran my bristle boar brush through it lightly and gasped—I didn’t have to brush furiously at it trying to get some areas to lay the way they should. I circled the house perplexed: It’d been two days — should I go ahead and wash it? It didn’t feel like it needed washing; it didn’t look like it needed washing… But surely that couldn’t be right!
So I went ahead and did the no-poo wash again.
Same beautiful results, only this time even less oil at my roots.
Um, yeah. Shampoo and conditioner? I’m never going back.
P.S. — I also stopped using SheaMoisture baby shampoo on my 7 month-old son, who has infant eczema. Now I use honey water to wash his hair and apple cider vinegar rinse to condition it. Of course his hair came out soft, light and shiny, and his scalp loves it! The earlier you start, the better.
P.P.S. — Honey no-poo might not work for you. Try it for a month; if your hair hasn’t shown any signs of improvement by then, it probably isn’t right for you. Coconut milk no-poo might not work for you, either. But something out there does. In ancient times people didn’t use shampoo and conditioner: they used the natural resources in their environment to care for their hair. So don’t give up! Keep trying things; keep looking for natural options until you strike gold. In the meantime, eliminate chemical hair products, blow-dry on low heat and use natural shampoo and conditioner (something like Jason) until you’ve found the no-poo that works for you. Use natural oils high in vitamin E to deep-condition your hair every once in a while; it will repair your hair shafts and minimize your hair’s need to produce oil, thus setting you up for success when you do use a no-poo. And God bless!
