How to “Like” Your Own Coffee Date

Neelanjana Gautam, the talented writer from The Statesman, and former faculty Loreto College, Kolkata, has partnered with LetsHaveCoffee to share her thoughts on how to break the ice on your first date. We highly recommend these tips that will help you land the second date and more!

LetsHaveCoffee is a discovery app to help you find people you would love to get to know more (now available on app store).

When coffee dates happen, they happen for a reason. If you spill the beans and slurp your cream, well, all is not that grim! You just happened to live through a dream.

The much hyped, sugarcoated, often times funny and awkward, nerve wracking yet exciting debut coffee date could be more than just what it is so famous for. It’s a catalyst, a stimulus, a life event, a memory spamming your news feed — screaming to the world that you are almost there, in a relationship.

Now how you get to that point is what we are spinning here. One sure way of getting around the fence is to get to know the person you have a fancy for. Asking the right kind of questions and not just merely ticking some set boxes does go a long way in getting those “likes” in your head. Let’s delve into a few issues that don’t fall into the safe bet options. Your first date is not an interview. And you don’t have to get it all right. Rather than throwing a rehearsed script at the guy across the table, be more engaged, open, and receptive.

For example, if you ask a guy what he does, and he says that he is a graphic illustrator, your ideal response could be to take a cue from there and ask why he chose to pursue that, instead of a simple nod and moving on to the next question. That way you expand the conversational space, and can also chip in with your own responses. You listen carefully and could possibly find a similar story about your life that you can share as well. This way you slowly get deeper into things, and perhaps make a statement or two about what you liked about him while he was talking. Now who doesn’t love to hear that? It’s all about feeling good and connecting through senses — the media that need a little bit of harness today.

By this time, a certain amount of comfort and camaraderie would settle in. You could pick a dessert that you have been long craving, and drop in some sizzling hints about a cocktail dress that you are going to wear at the next office bash. His reactions would say a lot about him, his attitude, and preferences. And if you like what he says, get yourself braced for some bold and experimental fun things. Nothing beats the kick of a smoking hot coffee.

How about trying something new, rather than stick to the formula? Like, “What would be something about you that could take me aback?” Or, “What’s in your locker?” We are not asking you to open up a can of worms, but showing your diverse streaks could make it more colorful. It is as much intriguing as it is fun to explore and discover each other on the spur — off-guard, spontaneous declarations often bring out the best face of the date.

Be a little daring and ace your first one. Go ahead, sign the check, girl!

Thanks a lot Neelanjana Gautam from Team LetsHaveCoffee! Folks, you can also find Neelanjana on FaceBook and her website .

Yours, Team LetsHaveCoffee. Sign up now.