Letters to Hawthorne 2: Dreams
Before I was an Exo I think I dreamed of other things. Sometimes between wakefulness and sleep I remember them, fragments of fragments, dreams long past. Soaring through the sky as only the birds can know, swimming in the deeps of the ocean beyond the border of darkness. Do you still have these dreams of wonder or has the Red War taken its toll upon your sleep?
After I was remade I only dream the Deep Stone dream. The dream all Exo’s dream, there is the field before the tower of our birth. It is said that is where our consciousness was seeded but how can that be since so many of us have memories of what we were before? I think it is true that some gained consciousness at that tower, and that they are the ones who dream of the golden field and find the tower easily. The rest of us, those whose consciousness was implanted upon our Exo frame, we dream of an army we must fight before we reach the tower.
The army is made up of everyone we’ve ever known, and we must in the dream kill them all to reach the tower that calls. Often we do not make it, we die in one way or another, killed by a friend or a stranger we saw in passing. There are some who say we dream this dream because we are made to kill. I am of a different opinion, to accept our new form we must kill everything that we knew, any bond that ties us to our life before and in so doing we make peace with our machine.
Dear Hawthorne, if ever someone offers you a gift ask yourself first what is the cost of your accepting it.