Getting what you need
I’ve taken several weeks off from writing because my gas tank has been empty. I’ve struggled to find the energy necessary to write something that is coherent. Not that I didn’t try. These past few weeks, I have Version 1, 2, 3 and sometimes 4. My writing and thought process felt stilted and forced. So, I took a break. Although I think the ordering of my strengths have changed somewhat, I’m afraid that Achiever may still be #1 because it’s hard for me to not feel like I’m following through on something.
Then this weekend, I received a few unrequested gifts. The first is this coloring that someone I don’t even know gave to me. On it she had written, you are not alone. It’s weird because intellectually, I know this. And objectively, I’m surrounded by amazing and caring folks. But sometimes I can get so wrapped up in my head, so overwhelmed by the in-box, and so frenzied by the time scarcity trap that I have created for myself that it’s hard to experience and embrace the connectedness that is so readily available.
The second gift was when I went for a massage and was asked to draw a card out of a deck. The following is what I drew — Perspective: To see, know, feel. I believe that this notion of perspective is the first step towards the intentionality of CPPR 3.0 that we have been talking about. It’s also necessary when a project or an idea reaches the creative destruction phase of the eco-cycle. When working in complex systems, moving forward sometimes means standing still. Action before fully understanding why you are doing something can be counterproductive and extremely frustrating.
My takeaways I wish for you from these jots are this —
- When things feel overwhelming or you feel stuck, stop. Look around you and be open to asking for and receiving what you need.
- Not knowing for a period of time is okay. Sometimes we believe in something so much and are so excited about the possibilities, that we feel compelled to act. While we can’t sit around forever waiting for the perfect solution, it can be incredibly powerful to push pause and give yourself some time to know, to see, to feel — to gain perspective.
I hope you have had a weekend where you have also been able to receive a kindness or message that you needed. I look forward to a great week with you and making some magic.