Calling All Supergirl Fans

Are you tired of seeing unhealthy relationships portrayed in the media? So am I. That’s why I urge you to join me and call out this injustice during Supergirl’s airing live on Monday night, March 6th, 2017 whether it be EST, CT, or PST airings. We’ll be taking to Twitter with the hashtags “#DatingNotHating” and “#DatingViolence” to show that we are upset with the romanticization of Kara and Mon-El’s unhealthy relationship. And example tweet can be “ #Supergirl romanticizes an unhealthy relationship and that’s not okay! #DatingNotHating #DatingViolence” or something along those lines. REMEMBER: Be respectful. We also ask that, if you can, go ahead and give an example of another couple or show or even your own similar experiences as well. You might be asking, however, what even IS dating violence?

Dating Violence is any physical, sexual, emotional or psychological violence in a dating relationship. It involves things like controlling behavior for example a partner that has to know exactly what you’re doing at all times. Emotional and psychological violence includes jealousy, belittling you and threats. Physical abuse involves shoving, hitting, hair pulling and pinching. Sexual abuse involves unwanted touching and forced sex. The list goes on and on.

Dating Violence is very common sadly and those in a violent relationship most likely don’t know. These behaviors are seen as normal, thanks to the media. About 20% of high school girls and 13% of high school boys report that they have been sexually or physically abused by a partner. 43% of college women report that they have been abused by a partner. Some statistics say that as much as 1 out of 3 teen experience some type abuse from a romantic partner.

While Mon-El has not physically harmed Kara (not including the physical fight they had at the beginning of the season), he does exhibit a lot of the emotionally violent behaviors. For example, as outlined both here and here, he is shown to disrespect, belittle, and guilt trip Kara, in addition to acting jealous and claiming her as property specifically with the words “she’s with me”. These aren’t “cutesy” or “normal” things to say to a partner and the fact that their relationship is given center stage is harmful to the young demographic of the show. The younger generation looks up to Supergirl because she is a hero, a feminist, a good person, whom others want to be and if they see the the way Mon-El treats her and how it’s downplayed as “petty fights”, then people will start to think that kind of behavior is okay.

Some of Mon-El’s verbal abuse, taken from here

Not to mention that this is a fresh, brand-new relationship of which Kara and Mon-El have been fighting since the start of. The behavior he exhibits is a huge red flag and while things may or may not improve in the show, the same cannot be said for people who are in these types of relationships in real life. If Mon-El can turn his behavior around then great, we need to see more of that in TV because it’s not all about the brooding asshole trope who falls in love with the good-girl who accepts his behavior because he’s had a rough time. We need to portray a healthy way of communication, a healthy way to resolve fights, and a healthy overall relationship.